Telling yourself a better story

Image from Flickr – slightlyeverything

I really haven’t had that exciting of a life. There are a lot of things I wish I would have done, instead of just sitting around and complaining about having a boring life. So I pretty much like to make it up. I’d rather tell a story about somebody else.
Kurt Cobain

We all tell ourselves a story.  We often tell that story to others too. Our story is the way we see ourselves in the world, our view of what’s happened to us in the past, and who we are because of it.

Sometimes our story is sad, sometimes, it’s funny, sometimes it’s downright terrible.  And we trot that story out time after time; for ourselves, our families, our friends…

But what if that story doesn’t serve you? What if that story compounds low self-esteem, or failure, or loneliness? What if that story is a constant reminder to us of a painful time in our lives?

The Law of Attraction states that whatever we think about most and talk about most is what we draw to us.  That or things of a similar vibration.

You need to ask yourself if you want to keep living that story.

Because maybe it’s time to write a new one…

Tell yourself a different story – image from freedigitalimages.com

Journal Exercise:

Today, write yourself a new story.  Make it up, like any good writer would, but let it have a few bones that are real.

Tell yourself a story that is empowering and positive.

Look for examples from your life that illustrate a different truth for you – of times when things have worked out, when people have been kind or helpful, when you’ve known success, when miracles have happened.

Or, if you are feeling brave, or creative, just write a new and entirely ficticious account of your past, present or future.

What is the life you would like to live? Write about that AS IF IT IS ALREADY HAPPENING!!!

Here are a few prompts to get you started.  Choose whatever most appeals and then start writing:

  • My life is unfolding in the most exciting of ways…
  • The place I’m living now is so well suited to me.  It is…
  • You’ll never guess how it happened.  It all worked out perfectly in the end. One day…
  • So we’ve been together for…
  • And one day a letter came in the mail and it said…
  • The doctors couldn’t believe it…
  • My life is so blessed because…
  • It’s my dream life.  I have to pinch myself to remind me that it’s real. Now my world looks like…
  • I answered the phone and you’ll never believe who was on the other end…
  • OMG! This is exactly what happened, and it’s FABULOUS…
  • It feels so good to be able to…
  • My career is going from strength to strength.  Already I have…
  • I’ve planned the most amazing holiday.  It starts with…
  • Such wonderful relationships in my life.  Let me tell you a bit about them…
  • Now there’s no more money worries because…
  • My proudest moment is…
  • I finally achieved…

Words really do have a magical power in your life.  So choose them wisely – when you write them, speak them, think them… Expect magic and know that you are worthy and deserving of good in your life. NOW is your time to invite the future to look different to the past.  Believe! ♥

Image from favim.com

My Embarrassing Affirmation Confession

Image from thebeginwithinblog.com

You affect your subconscious mind by verbal repetition ~ W. Clement Stone

Affirmations are a known powerful tool for change, and are used by many people for creating positive shift and personal growth.  Louise Hay has made affirmations a modern-day medicine for the soul. (You can sign up for her daily affirmations here)

An affirmation is a simple statement, said in the present tense, that affirms positively a fact or situation that is desirable in your life.  You state that thing as if it is already happening, and you repeat that statement many, many times, to imprint the message in your subconscious mind, so that this thing becomes true for you.

Here are some common examples:

Image from affirmart.blogspot

Image from affirmart.blogspot

Image from alexafalk.blogspot

I must admit that when I first heard about affirmations I was quite sceptical.

Stating something as a truth and then repeating that statement often, even if it hadn’t yet shown up in my life, seemed a little daft.  If nothing else, I felt  fake to be claiming things that weren’t actually true for me yet.

But the experts agreed that affirmations could change your life. What did I have to lose by a little positive thinking?

And this is where my embarrassment comes in…

I created a test affirmation.

I didn’t affirm that I choose health.  I didn’t affirm that every day in every way I am getting better and better.  I didn’t even affirm that great wealth is mine now.

No.  My affirmation was pretty much a deliberate act of ‘New-Age Thinking’ defiance.  There was nothing spiritual or enlightened about it at all. I chose it because I expected it to fail miserably.

This is what I chose:

Everything I want is always on special

That’s right. I affirmed that whenever I wanted to buy something, the Universe would provide it for me at a discounted rate.

Image from l3electronics.com

I thought this was hilarious when I made it up. It seemed like the silliest idea in the world. But I dedicatedly repeated my affirmation whenever I thought about it – which was often seeing it made me laugh so much, and seeing I was going through a pretty rotten time financially back then.

And here’s the second part of my embarrassing confession…

It worked!

If I needed chocolate, my favourite brand was on special. Pasta? Reduced to clear! Holiday? Stay ten nights, pay for five.

The more I affirmed, the more noticeable it became until one day I just accepted this statement as my new reality.  Everything I want is always on special.

I’m so well known for this affirmation now among my family and friends that they expect this miracle to roll out for me too! I recently went to the shop to buy some ice-cream for dessert, taking a friend with me. “I knew this would be on special,” she said as she took a tub of heavily discounted premium deliciousness. “I should come shopping with you more often!”

We needed a holiday. A few days ago my husband and I booked a cruise. Why a cruise? We got 78% off the advertised rack rate. And then got a room upgrade!

Image from maritimeheritage.org

When we went to book the airfares QANTAS was having a one day sale, and  a return ticket from Brisbane to LA was ridiculously discounted. The travel agent couldn’t believe our good timing. We just smiled, looked at each other and repeated Everything I want is always on special.

Affirmations work. I have plenty of others that I use now too, but my first ever affirmation is still my favourite.  It might not be ‘spiritual’ but it’s lots of fun, and it affirms to me that I live in an abundant and benevolent Universe.

Here are some others that I love:

Something wonderful will happen to me today (I love to affirm this when I first wake up – it sets the tone for my whole day!)

All good things come to me

I am surrounded with kind and helpful people

My creativity flows, and my good ideas are endless

My body is returning itself to health. Healing and well-being are my natural energies

If such simple thinking can change your life, and bring positivity and joy, maybe it might be worth you trying some affirmations for yourself. The video at the bottom of this post has some good ideas for affirmations too.

I’m holding you in that good space – wishing you well, wishing you love, joy, health and abundance.  Bless xx


Eight Ingredients for Better Health

Image from healthycare-tutorials.blogspot.com

To keep the body in good health is a duty… otherwise we shall not be able to keep our mind strong and clear.  Buddha

Our bodies are the vehicle for our Souls. By honouring and looking after our physical vehicle we are then much better able to access and work with our mental and spiritual gifts.

There are eight practical, proven and simple things that we can do or include in our lives each day in order to help build up energy within our bodies, and to maintain our physical health and vitality.  This is not rocket science – it is fundamental and basic information.  Yes, what I am about to share sounds like what your Nana might have told you (in fact, my Nana told me).  Yes, it works!!!

These ‘miracle’ ingredients for a long and healthy life are:

  1. Water
  2. Sleep
  3. Fresh Air
  4. Clean and Nourishing Food
  5. Movement
  6. Spiritual Health
  7. Love
  8. Self Control

Let’s explore each of these eight vital ingredients in more detail.


1.  Water

Drink plenty of fresh, clean water.

Image by ecowoman.net

Suggestions:  For best results take your water at room temperature to minimise pressure on your internal organs which would otherwise have to heat the water up before using it.  Keep a bottle of water with you at all times, even beside your bed.  Often residual low level fatigue is the result of chronic dehydration.  For even better results, write positive words and affirmations on your water bottle.  If you suffer from dizziness or low blood pressure, add a small pinch of celtic salt to your water bottle.  This will help restore the electrolyte balance within your body and assist with the uptake of water and oxygen by your body’s cells.

2.  Sleep

Get adequate (what your body really needs, not what you let it have!) sleep.

Image by ALAMY

Suggestions:  Most of us need a minimum of eight hours, and sometimes more if we are fighting off an infection, healing, growing or changing.   Did you know that most of the western world’s adult population is sleep deprived?  Since the introduction of the electric light bulb, and then television, adults have been slowly eroding their hours of quiet time and sleep during the evening hours.  Where we once had a few hours of quiet talk, or reading, or other gentle and relaxing activities to wind down before sleep, we now have over-stimulation from television.  We sleep from one to four hours less per night on average than our physical body requires.  The artificial light we are exposed to during the day in offices and shopping centres, and at night in our own homes reduces chemical and hormonal input from our bodies that would ordinarily prepare us for sleep.  We lose our natural sleep rhythms.  This sort of prolonged sleep deprivation, where you get substandard sleep or inadequate sleep takes some months to recover from, and prevents the body from healing, solving problems and spiritual connection during the sleeping hours.

To improve sleep, get some exposure to natural full-spectrum sunlight every day.  (Don’t wear sunglasses as this changes the spectrum of the sun’s rays.) Twenty minutes would be a minimum.  Don’t go to bed immediately after a big meal.  Let the digestion process have around two hours first to get started so that your sleep is not compromised.  If this is hard to do, eat earlier, or make your main meal lunch so that you are only digesting light food at night time.  Keep your bedroom quiet, dark and well ventilated.  Take at least half an hour before sleep to wind down.  Don’t do this in front of the television!  Take a shower, read a book, listen to music, meditate, make love.  You may also want to remove electro-magnetic radiation from the bedroom, or at least get rid of electrical appliances beside, behind or under the bed.  Lavender essential oil aids relaxation and sleep.  In winter keep your feet warm, or have a warm shower just before going to be so that you don’t get into bed cold.

3.  Fresh Air

Oxygen and clean air is vital to our well being on every level.

Image by shutterstock – naldzgraphics.net

Suggestions:  Get out into the fresh air and sunshine each day.  Oxygen is vital for our well being.  Sunshine is important for providing vitamin D. Use good posture to enable you to breathe deeply and to avoid shallow breathing.  Take several slow, deliberate deep breaths a few times a day to recharge and re-oxygenate your blood.  Make sure that your home, office and bedroom are well ventilated, with a good flow of natural air.  Don’t spend all of your time in air-conditioning, and if you do use an air-conditioner keep it well maintained.  Minimise dust and mould in your environment.  Avoid exposure to chemicals, especially within your home.  Don’t exercise on busy roads.

4.  Clean and Nourishing Food

Food is both fuel and medicine for our bodies.  Our bodies are the direct result of the quality of nutrition that we put into them.  Eat regularly to maintain a good supply of fuel to your brain and body.

Image from toptenzlists.com

Suggestions:  Food is best when it is freshly prepared, chemical free, and made with love.  Blessing your food, and eating in a relaxed environment really does make a difference.  Favour a plant-based diet, with the inclusion of good quality fats and proteins. Choose organic meats and free range chickens, and wild caught seafoods.  Grass fed beef has the same essential fatty acid ratio as fish – grain fed beef does not, and is not nearly as good for you.  Make sure you get a good range of fresh vegetables each day – these can also be eaten as juice.  Fruit is better taken as a whole food than as a juice so that you can minimise your concentrated sugar intake.  Eat fruit and vegetables in season.  Out of season food has often had to travel a long way to get to you, and will have lost a lot of its vital energy and goodness.  Nuts and seeds are good, and so are whole grains.  Naturally fermented foods such as yoghurt, keffir and so on are also good for your gut health.  If a food has a prolonged shelf life, it will also have little life force.

Reduce and avoid food that is mass produced, fast food, or high in sugars, salts, stimulants (such as caffeine) fats and flour.  Avoid artificial colours and additives.  Eat when you’re hungry, and pay attention to when and why you eat so that you can identify and manage emotional eating – where we eat for comfort or entertainment rather than because our body needs fuel.  Sharing a meal with a friend or family member is always a good way to reduce stress.  Don’t eat in front of television, and don’t eat when you are upset.  Always calm down before eating.  Different bodies prefer different diet variations – if necessary find a good natural therapist or dietician to help you with your food choices.  Listen to your body – it will soon tell you what it does and doesn’t like.  In times of stress or illness, it may be necessary to take additional supplements of vitamins, minerals and/or herbs.  Seek help if you need it.

5.  Movement

Our bodies were designed to move.  They must be moved, nurtured and stretched on a daily basis.  Movement allows the internal organs to function well, it keeps joints lubricated, circulates blood, oxygen and lymph within our bodies, and helps us to stay supple, strong and mobile.

Image from healthwise-everythinghealth.blogspot.com.au

Suggestion:  Movement helps decrease obesity, depression and a host of other ills.  The longer we go without movement, the more difficult movement becomes.  Find some exercises that you enjoy, and try to become active at work and home.  Learn some basic stretching, and if you want to understand and nourish the physical body on an even higher level, learn yoga, tai chi or qi gong.  Movement was never just about going to a gym, although you might enjoy this.  Movement is also about walking, surfing, lawn bowls, stretching, swimming on a hot day, skiing in winter, dancing anytime, gardening, housework, fencing, playing with children or animals, chasing your lover around the bedroom, building, creating, self expression and pure joy.  It can also be about the discipline of a martial art or practice such as yoga, or about the fun of teamwork playing footie, cricket, tennis doubles, or tug-of-war.  Not so bad after all, is it?

6.  Spiritual Health

Those people who have an active faith, and who practice regular connection with that faith have better physical health and longevity, lower stress levels, faster healing, greater rates of ‘unusual and unexpected’ recoveries and greater levels of personal acceptance and satisfaction.

Painting by Goro Fujita

Suggestion:  Spirituality isn’t about going to church, although for some people that can be an important focus of their faith.  It means taking time to talk with God and your Guides, Angels and Loved Ones who’ve passed over.  It’s about having a connection to the earth and all living things.  Some people do this through listening to music, some people do this through creating art, and some people do this through going for a walk in nature.  How you find your Soul, and talk with your God is up to you.  Spiritual Health is about making time to go within, through prayer, meditation and self reflection.  And doing these things as a normal part of your daily routine.  Take time to learn about your spirituality, to read and share and grow your faith.  Take time to practice your connection.  Use spiritual tools, and give and receive spiritual energy.  Pray for yourself and others on a regular basis.  It is also powerful to meet with like-minded people to share the experience.  This can be through worship, group meditations, sharing healings and readings, attending festivals and workshops, or even just holding hands together before a meal.

7.  Love

Love is fundamental to the human spirit.  We need to learn to give and to receive love, and to do this daily!  Love is the most powerful energy in the Universe.

Image from www.soupornuts.com

Suggestion:  Self love and self care top this list.  This includes treating ourselves well, and surrounding ourselves with energies that uplift and support us.  We all need someone to love.  Family, friends, partners, even animals.  We need to be able to actively demonstrate love through our thoughts, actions and intentions.  It is also important that we open ourselves up to receive love as well.  This is often much harder to do, than to love others.  Become involved in helping others.  Use your spiritual faith to help you find ways to express Love in the World.

8.  Self Control

Self control is a conscious development of our will.  It is the voice of our wise self, and it becomes stronger and easier to identify the more we use it.  Self control allows us to stay true to who we are, and to what we know is good for us.

Image from arabia.msn.com

Suggestions:  Self control requires self trust, and self love.  If we come home from work feeling tired, it is easy to eat junk food and forgo exercise.  Self control is the wise and caring voice within us that urges us to eat something healthy, to take the dog for a walk, or to say ‘no’ to a second helping of dessert.  It is often difficult to exert any self control if we have not worked with this part of us for a long time.  When self control is not exercised, our inner critic – the ego, can make us feel very unhappy and inadequate.  This fuels low self esteem and can make the lack of self control even worse.  Our wise self whispers, “eat a salad and some fish” and we then need to exercise our self control to enable this to happen.  If instead we eat toast with jam, and a bowl of ice-cream, the ego will chastise us.  Your self talk might then sound like this: “Oh, you are so fat and weak.  You might as well eat another bowl of ice-cream.”  And so you do, and end up feeling worse about yourself, and believing that you have no will power.  If your self control is weak, start with small promises that you make and then keep with yourself.  As you fulfil each promise, this will strengthen your self control by building your sense of worth and self confidence.  If you slip back, be kind with yourself and just start again.

Journal Activity: Revisit each of the eight ingredients of good health.  For each ingredient, write down one small step that you could take in the next few days to strengthen that area within your own life.  Make sure the actions you want to take are small, measurable and achievable so that you can continue to strengthen your wellbeing, self belief and self control!

You’re not alone…

Feeling small – by Artist Jaime Zatloukal Best

sometimes

life can get you down

you can feel so small that you wonder if anyone knows you’re here

you might even wonder if anyone cares

Sad, wet and lonely puppy – Image from deliriously-angelic.blogspot

life’s burdens may weigh upon you

until you wonder how you’ll ever take another step

until you wonder if you’re cut out for this

until you doubt you’ll ever be the same

until you doubt you can ever know love, or joy or happiness again

A firefighter breaks down after the World Trade Centre collapse on September 11, 2001. Getty Images: Mario Tama

the pain of life can overwhelm you

but understand something…

you’re not alone

although sometimes it might feel like yours is the only voice

out there in the universe – close to home, or further away

there’s someone praying for you

there’s someone who cares

there’s someone holding that space of love and light and hope

there’s someone imbuing you with strength

Image from heavenawaits.wordpress.com

we are surrounded by unseen forces

angels and guides watch over us

love transcends all boundaries

Image from aloneinholyland.com

there are people we’ll never meet who wish us only good

there are hearts whose only thought

is that you be uplifted, that you know love, that you know peace

Candles lit as prayers for peace – image from prajjwal.wordpress.com

today perhaps it’s your turn to hurt

everything has its season

tomorrow might be your turn to hold that intention of love and safety for another

Image by freehugscampaign.org

we are, each of us, in this together

and together we find a way, for ourselves, for each other

today, know that I am here for you

holding that space

wishing you well

bless ♥ xx

The Healing Power of Flowers and Fairy Blessings

Flower fairy by Cicely Mary Barker. Image from eso-garden.com

I’d rather have roses on my table than diamonds on my neck.  ~ Emma Goldman

Flowers are a precious gift from nature.  Their colour, fragrance, shape and texture have a marvellous ability to impart energetic and healing qualities to us.

My beautiful fairy friend Sokli (you can read about her here) and I chose these flower pictures for their energy and how this can positively affect you.  We have also meditated on each image to charge it up for you.

Here’s Sokli’s message to you:

Hiya. Hi Hi Hi! Remember that the Earth is your Mother too, and she loves you very much and so do we. Flowers is always a nice gift for yourselves and you don’t even have to pick them, you can grow them in your garden or go for a nice walk and drink up all their lovely goodness. Even perfumes that smell of flowers are good for you because they still have the magic in them from the flower. Flowers is to make us happy and to give us gifts. I love them very much and I hope you do too, and we made some nice flower presents for you so that you remember how much we love you. It’s a Mothers Day present for EVERYONE. Okay bye and thanks for being our friend. We love love love you Love from your friend Sokli xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The Fairy of Flowers by Cathy Delanssay

Instructions for using today’s post

Today I want you to scroll down through the following images and then let yourself come back to the one you are most drawn to.

When you have chosen your flower, scroll further down for that flower’s specific gift to you in your healing journey.

I hope you enjoy this exercise as much as Sokli and I enjoyed putting it together.

Love and Light,

Nicole ♥ xx

White Rose – Image from fanpop.com

Liatris – Blazing Star Flower – Image from flowerinfo.org

Pink Lily – Image by allbestwallpapers.com

Blue Iris – Image from floweringflowers.net

Nasturtium – Image by flowerfinder.net

Daisy – Image from desktopia.net

Hibiscus – Image by arichards63 Flickriver

♥ The Healing Message and Gift of each Flower ♥

Each flower has a message for you. We have also selected a crystal to best support the message and energies of the flower you choose.  You could wear or hold this crystal, pop it in your pocket, under your pillow or beside your bed. (If you’d like to know more about working with crystals click here) The Power Word is a word to remind yourself of the quality you most need and that you are strongly attracting right now.  You can turn it into your own personal mantra by saying “I choose ___________ ” (insert your Power Word). The Australian Bush Flower Essence is a vibrational remedy that holds the energy and essence of a particular flower within it. This remedy will be supportive of you right now, and will help you open to positive change and healing.

♥ White Rose – Messages and love from the spiritual realms, loved ones watching over you, the need for self-care and self nurture in your life. ♥ Best Crystal – Rose Quartz  ♥ Power Word – Love  ♥ Australian Bush Flower Essence – Bottlebrush

 Liatris – Fertility, new creative ideas and partnerships, blooming self confidence and identity.  ♥ Best crystal – Citrine  ♥ Power Word – Becoming  ♥ Australian Bush Flower Essence – Macrocarpa

 Pink Lily – Inner strength, confidence, recognition of your worth, ability to act with grace and courage.  ♥ Best crystal – Tourmaline (any colour)  ♥ Power Word – Confidence  ♥ Australian Bush Flower Essence – Dog Rose

 Blue Iris – Rest, relaxation and unwinding of mental tension, an easing of what troubles you, help is at hand. ♥ Best crystal – Amethyst  ♥ Power Word – Clarity  ♥ Australian Bush Flower Essence – Crowea

 Nasturtium – Joy, sunshine, fun, friendship and laughter. Finding the path back to happiness. ♥ Best crystal – Aventurine  ♥ Power Word – Joy  ♥ Australian Bush Flower Essence – Five Corners

 Daisy – The natural world, nature spirits, fairies, physical healing, seeing the unseen, the healing power of nature. ♥ Best crystal – Jasper  ♥ Power Word – Trust  ♥ Australian Bush Flower Essence – Sunshine Wattle

 Hibiscus – Individuality, freedom to walk your own path, unique voice, flow and vitality. ♥ Best Crystal - Carnelian ♥ Power Word – Energy  ♥ Australian Bush Flower Essence – Little Flannel Flower

Knowing When to Walk Away

Walking away… Last Deviation by Seryia Uchina

“Sometimes walking away has nothing to do with weakness, and everything to do with strength. We walk away not because we want others to realise our worth and value, but because we finally realise our own.” ~ Robert Tew

You know the old saying I am sure.  The definition of madness (some actually say stupidity) is to do the same thing over and over, and yet keep expecting a different result.

Walking away is not an admission of defeat.  Walking away is about recognising our own boundaries, our own limits, and our own needs.

So how do you know if it’s time to walk away?  (And I’m not just talking relationships – I’m talking jobs, business deals, addictions, habits, workloads, friendships, situations… )

Look for these signs, and ask yourself honestly if any of these describe you:

If it’s just not adding up, no matter which way you crunch the numbers…

Image by Pixomar

If the warning bells keep going off in your mind…

Image by cbenjasuwan

If you’re not being respected, honoured or valued…

Image by kenfotos

If they keep doing the thing they promised to stop doing…

Image by chrisroll

If it’s always your fault, even when it’s not…

Image by nuttakit

If it’s only ever about them…

Vanity by John William Waterhouse 1908

If the only thing you ever get is pain, pain and more pain..

Image from bemycareercoach.com

If you recognise that to continue with this situation/relationship is only going to drag you further and further down…

Image by Bert Blondeel

If your head is so full, or your body is so tired, or both, that you need to push back for a bit and go get some fresh air…

Image from bbrblog.com

If there’s no love left, if you’re not having fun any more…

Image by winstonwolfe

If your heart is being pulled in a new direction…

Image from allwomenstalk.com

Any of these things are serious cause for consideration.

Life is short. For you. For them. If it’s not working, and you’ve done all you can do, or all you’re willing to do, walk away. Do it in your own time – there’s no need to make life harder for yourself. But do it. Do it because if you don’t value yourself, no-one else will.

 

♥ You may find these posts useful too:

Knowing when to let go

Emotions and their impact on your health

The Broken Robot Repair Shop

How to Nurture your sense of Self Love

What to do when you don’t know where you’re going

Defining Your Priorities in Life

This beautiful image by Kittisak

Life is short. Life is precious. And in our lives we need to be able to fit into a limited amount of time the things that will satisfy us, grow us, and make us happy.

So many people that I know have this terrible sense of never having enough time, and never getting around to the things that are important to them. Those dreams and desires keep getting relegated to ‘tomorrow’, and as we all know, tomorrow never comes.

If you’re in a place of overwhelm and exhaustion, you might find this post helpful to get you started: Simplicity is a Choice  You can also read about how I got my own personal priority act together here: The gift of impermanence OR live like you’re dying

So how do we work out what’s important to us? Journalling is one of the best ways I have found for clearing out the clutter in our minds and tidying our thoughts onto a page.  Today’s post will help you start that process of clarifying what matters to you, and how you want your life to look.

Journal Activity:

Image by nuttakit

It’s important to re-orient yourself back to your own internal priorities for this exercise, rather than the pressures of your life the way it is right now.

If possible, take yourself somewhere away from work or home – maybe a library, a coffee shop or a park, even the back yard or a veranda could work. Having surroundings that are not associated with chores, duties or your to-do-list will be very helpful for this process. Allocate at least ten minutes for this journal task, but note that if you haven’t been giving yourself much time lately you may need considerably longer.  The investment in yourself will be worth it!

Start by writing this passage into your journal or diary. Feel free to use coloured inks, stickers, doodles or anything else that makes your heart sing.

My life is precious to me, and I recognise that it’s a gift.  Before I was even born I was dreaming of the things I could do, experience and discover in this lifetime.

Inside me is a strong wisdom about what matters to me. My heart, my soul, my gut - they all have messages for my mind to hear and understand - and I’m really ready to listen.

More than that, I’m ready for change.  I‘m ready to act upon my priorities.  My life matters to me.  My time is now! 

Image by graur codrin

Choose any of the following journal starters and then begin writing:

  • This idea in the back of my mind is
  • I feel unbelievably pressured because
  • All I really want to be doing is
  • If I had more time I would
  • The thing that lights me up inside is
  • I know I need to
  • If I won a million dollars, suddenly I would be able to
  • My biggest regret is that
  • If I could find a way to support myself I would
  • Ever since I was little I have dreamed of
  • The secret hope inside me is
  • I get a huge surge of relief every time I think about
  • My whole world would change if
  • It makes me outrageously happy to think about
  • People have always said that I
  • When I look back on my life, I’d like to be able to say that
  • The things on my personal bucket list are

We never know what life has in store for us. You’ll never please everyone, but the one person we often forget to please is ourselves. You are worthy, valuable and you came to this life to live your dreams. Maybe it’s time to honour that in some small way. Live without regrets! Live each day not so that you can cross it off and breathe a sigh of weary relief, but so that it counts for you, so that it matters to you and to your dreams. ♥

PS – Nickelback says it so well… ↓

Soul Mates – How to Recognise One

A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge.
Thomas Carlyle

You might wonder what a Soul Mate relationship feels like, what it looks like, and how you’ll know…

Let’s start by looking at what a Soul Mate relationship is not.

Image from perpetualkid.com

A Soul Mate will not share every view, feel as you do about everything in the Universe, or be your clone.

A Soul Mate relationship will not be about never arguing.

It will not be about perfection.

Image from geekologie.com

A Soul Mate is not some strange sort of parasitic or unhealthy dependency where you simply can’t survive without them in your life, or where they love you all up and suck you dry, before discarding you to move onto someone fresh.

A Soul Mate relationship won’t be categorised by fear, relentless pain, uncertainty, a feeling of being trapped, or a sense of impending doom.

It won’t be an abusive relationship.

It won’t be a relationship that belittles you, puts you down, discredits or dishonours you. It won’t be a relationship that puts doubts in your head until you begin to question your own judgement, and where your confidence and esteem erode, little by little, until you are weak and frail – a shell of who you were before. You won’t need to keep earning the other person’s love, or proving yourself.

Image from contentinacottage.blogspot

So what does a Soul Mate relationship look like?

First and foremost, it is always categorised by love.  Not vain love or showy love – but the sort of enduring and deepening love that allows you to grow, together, into something stronger, better and wiser than you were before.

Soul Mate relationships endure – they allow us to suffer the pain, and find a way, together, to move forward. In the presence of love we learn forgiveness, acceptance, compassion.

They bring out the best in us.  They give us comfort, friendship, support, and (often at the most unexpected times) fireworks in our bellies. They help us know laughter, and tears, they help us find the strength in ourselves and in each other.

With a Soul Mate we feel safe, and that safety gives us courage to wander far from home, creating and exploring and enacting our dreams.

Soul Mates believe in us, they’ll fight for us, and they’ll call us on it when we’re mistaken, or heading in the wrong direction. They love us when we have done nothing to deserve it, and when we feel totally unworthy of love, and they remind us to take care of ourselves, while caring for us when we can’t.

And at times, they’ll annoy us or frustrate us so much that we’ll wonder why we didn’t choose the other person. We’ll wish they’d just take a hike and leave us well alone. But in the next breathe we’ll know how miserable we’d be without them in our lives.

The relationship, like yourself, will always be a work in progress, ever changing, ever evolving, at times difficult, sometimes even strained to the point where you momentarily  find it hard to recognise yourself or each other. But it will also have the familiarity and comfort of home. And in the arms of this relationship you’ll know two things – love and safety. More importantly, you’ll get to know your true self.

A Soul Mate will spilt your heart open and you won’t even mind the pain because of all the love and joy you find there.

Can they really be your Soul Mate if you argue?

I grew up in a house where I never heard my parents fight. Sadly, their marriage didn’t last, but it made me certain that arguing was not a part of anything to do with love.

After I had my very first major and quite vocal disagreement (yep, some people would call that a fight…) with my husband, just weeks after we’d been married, I sat on the internal staircase of our house and cried, while my husband went outside to wash the car.

My beautiful Guide, Rollo, spoke to me, and asked, ‘Do you know what a Soul Mate relationship is?’

‘Obviously not!’ I snivelled, feeling totally pathetic and like I’d just made the biggest mistake of my life in getting married. I was sure Rollo was going to confirm that for me too.

Instead he showed me a picture of an oyster. ‘Do you know what happens when a tiny grain of sand gets into that oyster?’ he asked.

‘No,’ I sniffed.

‘It irritates the hell out of the oyster’ my Guide boomed, laughter in his voice.

Exactly, I thought. Irritates the hell out of it.

‘And in the presence of love, the oyster wraps that irritation in a special substance and after a while the pain goes away.’

I felt my Guide smiling at me. ‘Then the tide turns, and that annoying grain of sand moves somewhere else in the oyster, and do you know what happens?’

‘No,’ I replied, slow on the uptake.

‘That grain of sand causes more irritation in a different spot. But if love is present, love keeps wrapping itself around the irritation. The oyster grows, and over time the oyster transforms that grain of sand, in the presence of love, into something of great value and lasting beauty.  That oyster grows a pearl.  Without the irritation and the need to grow, nothing extraordinary would have ever happened.  But when love is present, magical transformation is possible.’

Image from freewallpaper4me.com

I could have hugged Rollo. My wise Guide was absolutely right.  I stopped crying and went into the kitchen to make my husband a cup of tea.

It’s true.  Love transforms.  It helps us weather many storms.  It grows us.  It improves us. It comforts us and delights us. And at some stage it causes us pain (usually BECAUSE we love), and love helps us bear that pain. The pain doesn’t weaken us – it strengthens us.  And from that pain we grow into something beautiful.

Rumi, the great poet says it best:

“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” 

Double love hearts at sunset by Pink Sherbet Photography

Making Peace with Right Now while Holding a Picture of a Brighter Tomorrow

This beautiful image from utne.com

Don’t let your current reality dictate your future possibility.  Hold true to your dreams. Miracles are entirely possible if you dispense with miserable thinking!~ Nicole Cody

The reason for today’s post comes from something seemingly ordinary. But what’s ordinary for some can be positively miraculous for others.

Bert - patiently waiting for me on the stair mountain

Yesterday I walked up the stairs carrying two laptops and a ridiculously heavy bag of books. Ordinary enough, hey? But not for someone with cardiomyopathy. For over two years I have struggled with stairs, let alone carrying a load at the same time. Stairs usually leave me breathless as my enlarged heart battles to get blood and oxygen around to all the right places with the sudden burst of physical activity.

Yesterday I got to the top of the steps, walked into my office and then thought, “Oh. My. God.”

No chest pain, no panting or racing heart – just normal old got to the top of the stairs and kept walking.

Why is this such a big deal? Well, to me it proves a very important point:

Changing your thinking can change your life.

There is no point in fighting the reality of your current situation. If you’re fat, you’re fat.  If your finances are a mess, they’re a mess. If you procrastinate, well that’s just what you’ve been doing.  Stop fighting it, making excuses for it, or pretending it isn’t happening. Accept what is.

Accepting what is, without judgement, is the first step in making positive change in your life.

The second step is letting go of your attachment to what is.

Where you are today is the result of yesterday’s thinking, yesterday’s actions, yesterday’s focus or lack of focus.

The third step is to hold a clear picture in your mind of what you DO want in your life, and find a way to summon positive emotion around that.

According to the Law of Attraction, (there’s a good definition of the Law of Attraction here) whatever you focus your attention on, is what you draw to you in your life. Resisting or fighting anything, dwelling on it, obsessing on it, worrying on it, speaking of it – all those actions keep that thing you don’t want fixed firmly on your horizon.

This quote from Abraham really sums it up:

You will notice that those who speak most of prosperity, have it. Those who speak most of health, have it. Those who speak most of sickness, have it. Those who speak most of poverty, have it. It is Law. It can be no other way… The way you feel is your point of attraction, and so, the Law of Attraction is most understood when you see yourself as a magnet getting more and more of the way you feel. When you feel lonely, you attract more loneliness. When you feel poor, you attract more poverty. When you feel sick, you attract more sickness. When you feel unhappy, you attract more unhappiness. When you feel healthy and vital and alive and prosperous—you attract more of all of those things.

— Abraham

When my doctors first gave me a diagnosis of cardiomyopathy caused by a virus which had induced a heart attack, after everything else I’ve been through, I took a day or two to come back to a place of calm after the shock of their news. I accepted what they’d told me, and I set about making peace with that.  I decided to make every day count, and that has been a lasting Blessing in my life.

My doctors also told me that after two years, there was no chance of improvement, and to expect a decline, which might be steady or fast, and that would lead to needing a transplant, or possibly, death.

If I have cardiomyopathy, then that is my current reality. After the news I mourned, grieved, got over myself and moved on. I have made choices to focus on health and on life.  I have embraced natural therapies, food as medicine, and visualisation. I live with it, and I embrace the current reality of it.  It is what it is.  Sure I have had many reminders of my health situation, such as chest pain and lack of breath, but I have not let it define me, and I have often forgotten it is even there!

Each morning in my meditation, and each night before I go to bed, I see myself as healthy, vibrant and living a full life where I can share my joy and gifts with others. Why bother with this, when my life doesn’t look like that now?  Because reality has a funny way of changing itself over time…

And yesterday my reality shifted. Today I am in a different space!

I have always believed in holding a picture of a brighter tomorrow, of embracing optimism, doing what I can, and turning the rest over to the Universe.  I expect miracles. And in expecting them, they show up in my life.

So what about you? Stop looking at your life as it is and being unhappy with that.  Accept what is.  Forgive yourself and others if that is what’s needed. And then find a place in your life where you can summon the smallest amount of gratitude, appreciation or happiness. (Don’t know how to do that? Here’s some info that will help!)

Hold a picture in your heart of a brighter tomorrow. Trust. Cherish and nurture your dreams.  Miracles happen daily. They can happen for you too! ♥ xx

Seven Pictures to Re-Energise You and your Chakras

Chakras are energetic gateways or portals. Each has its own colour, and governs different areas and emotions within the body. I have meditated on each of the following images, and programmed each picture to energise, open, balance and heal your chakras.

How to use today’s blog:

  1. Slowly scroll down the page, gazing at each picture in turn.
  2. Notice which picture (or pictures) is more vibrant and attractive to you.
  3. Go back to that image (images) and spend a little longer.  Draw that colour deep into your body.  See if any words, impressions, emotions or images come up for you. You might even want to use that as the beginning of a journalling activity. These colours will feed and energise your chakras and are great indicators of what chakras are already flowing and working well or in the process of opening and healing.
  4. Also pay attention to any pictures that seem very flat and energetically unappealing. Note what chakra that picture relates to.  Once again see if any words, impressions, emotions or images come up for you. This flat energy will correspond to chakras that are blocked, stagnant or stuck.  Send them some white light and a little extra love.
  5. Run your eyes over the images again.  See if there is any change.  Eventually you’ll find that all of the pictures have an equal brightness as you come back into balance.

Base Chakra: Foundation, survival, security, safety, energy, money, grounding, physicality

Image of erupting volcano from styleofeye.com

Sacral Chakra: Creativity, well-being, sexuality, emotional expression, abundance, pleasure

Orange Flower by kamussen at deviantart.com

Solar Plexus Chakra: Self esteem, individuality, self-worth, self confidence, personal authority, I am

Yellow Marigolds image from jpegwallpapers.com

Heart Chakra: Love for self and others, inner peace, joy, giving and receiving

This gorgeous image from animalspot.net

Throat Chakra: Speaking your truth, asking for what you need, all forms of communication

This image from funxite.com

Third Eye Chakra: Imagination, intuition, vision, wisdom, innovation, decision making, spiritual connection 

Image from chriskeeney.com

Crown Chakra: Divine Connection, spirituality, bliss, purity, consciousness, unity, BEing

Image from en.wikipedia.org

I’d love to know how this activity felt for you – so please feel free to share any of your experiences by leaving a comment below.  Much love to you, and all of my intentions, blessings and well-wishes for you to feel energised, balanced and harmonised.

♥ Namaste ♥

Flower of Life - from jyoshita.com