“Progress means getting nearer to the place you want to be. And if you have taken a wrong turning, then to go forward does not get you any nearer.
If you are on the wrong road, progress means doing an about-turn and walking back to the right road; and in that case the man who turns back soonest is the most progressive man.”
~ C.S. Lewis
I spent the morning with my Lyme doctor yesterday. It’s been over a year since I embarked on a strict regime of diet, supplements, herbs and industrial quantities of various drug combinations. On top of my pre-existing meditation and alternate therapy practices that have kept me alive and functioning thus far, defying conventional prognosis.
Yesterday was all about evaluating my progress this past year, and determining our next course of action.
I went to my appointment armed with a list of symptoms: those which had improved, those which had worsened, new symptoms and those which have resolved and gone away. My list was only slightly shorter than War and Peace.
So, how did I go?
I can’t actually tell you yet.
I have a fistful of blood work tests that need to be done. I have to pee in a jar and poop in a cup.
I have to make appointments for a brain MRI, ultrasounds and scans of various organs and body parts. There is every kind of test for my heart.
And in the meantime I shall be drug and herb free. Two glorious weeks without this punishing regime of horrors. I feel like a kid at the beginning of summer vacation, with all those beautiful clear days stretched out ahead of me.
Once my results are in, we’ll formulate a new treatment plan, my doctors, alternate therapy practitioners and I.
I am looking forward to comparing where I am now with the results of previous tests and scans. I am hoping for good progress.
In the past thirty years, while I have dealt with declining health, often the only way to evaluate my progress or response to various healing agents was how I felt. I know lots of people who use that technique for evaluating their progress with Lyme treatments. And I think that is valid to some extent. If you feel better, you must BE better, right? And if you feel worse…
Truth is, I have felt WORSE, sometimes much worse, over the course of the previous year, as I have knuckled down and followed this healing path.
And I have had many times in my life where I have experienced a lessening of symptoms, or an upward swing for a while. When you live with chronic illness any kind of better day or improvement in energy and function, even if that improvement is marginal, seems like a really BIG thing.
But until last year, few of my improvements have ever lasted. And scientific evaluation of my condition over time, using evidence based medicine, prove that prior to 2013 I continued to deteriorate. Although, in my defense, I have stubbornly refused to die, even if that was my expected trajectory! 🙂
So, I welcome this next barrage of tests. I welcome being able to use the best that science and modern medicine can give me. I want to be able to critically evaluate what’s working, what isn’t, and working out from there where we go next. Yes, I am the psychic who embraces quantifiable results and proof of change!
I am hoping for measurable improvement. I’ll keep you posted as to how I go.
PS 🙂 Thank you to everyone who has contacted me with advice and suggestions. Some of your ideas and treatments have been happily embraced by myself and my very open-minded doctors. An especially big thank you to all the lymies who have given me tips on coping with herxing or who have suggested alternate therapies, herbs, essential oils and so on to compliment my current drug regime.
Thank you to my friends and readers. Your healing energies, prayers, letters and words of encouragement have meant the world to me, and have kept me going through the darkest of times.
And for all if the people who have contacted me with suggestions about changing my obviously-flawed thinking which caused my disease (Dude, get with the 21st century – they are actually called pathogens and you can see them under a microscope!) , repenting of sins, God’s cursing of psychics, past life regressions as THE definitive treatment, multi-level marketing product miracle cures accompanied by pages of written testimonials about people feeling better, and stories of people who have cured their Lyme disease with a crystal, drinking their own urine (I went there already and it didn’t work!) thirty-day water fast (tried that too), psychic surgery, amazing technological device or a simple solution of bi-carb soda or other common household product, thank you. I’m always opening to expanding my knowledge and trying new things. However… If you can claim a cause or cure, I would appreciate your evidence and long-term results to back this up.