“There are two types of people on planet Earth, Batman and Iron Man. Batman has a secret identity, right? So Bruce Wayne has to walk around every second of every day knowing that if somebody finds out his secret, his family is dead, his friends are dead, everyone he loves gets tortured to death by costumed supervillains. And he has to live with the weight of that secret every day. But not Tony Stark, he’s open about who he is. He tells the world he’s Iron Man, he doesn’t give a shit. He doesn’t have that shadow hanging over him, he doesn’t have to spend energy building up those walls of lies around himself. You’re one or the other – either you’re one of those people who has to hide your real self because it would ruin you if it came out, or you’re not one of those people. And the two groups aren’t even living in the same universe.” ~ David Wong
When I first read this quote I had one of those aha moments. The words resonated for me because, you see, I’ve been both.
Until my early thirties I lived like Batman. My great secret was that I am psychic. I have been since I was a child.
I remember so clearly the afternoon my best friend at high school passed judgement on an advertisement in a women’s magazine, showing a stereotypical psychic in a purple robe and turban with her hands suspended over a crystal ball. “It’s such a scam,” said my friend. “Psychics are all bullshit. They just exploit stupid people and the vulnerable.”
My other friends all nodded their heads in agreement. There was something contemptuous about both the people claiming to be psychic, and those people dumb enough or desperate enough to use their services. Lotto numbers. Soul Mates. Fortune Telling… Intelligent people made their own way in the world, did their own research, and chose trusted professionals to be their life advisors. Not women with exotic names who wore jewelled turbans and touted lucky numbers. Here I was, a well-educated young woman at an academic school, intending to go on to university studies. How could I claim to be like the crystal-waving freak?
I was so worried about being found out. About ending up an outcast. All I could think to do was withdraw further so that no-one would even suspect this thing in me, engage with people in a way that was all about them and never about me, and stay under the radar until this phase in my life had well and truly passed.
For years I was ashamed to be me. I hid my abilities and true nature, except where I knew it was safe to share the truth of my life.
What an exhausting and miserable way to live. Always in constant fear of being discovered, judged and ostracised. Of no longer being taken seriously.
Eventually illness stripped so much of my old self away that all that remained was my intuitive and psychic ability. The Universe certainly had the last laugh. The thing I fought so hard to hide was the only thing left that I could do.
That was when I decided that it was better to live like Iron Man – Tony Stark. To openly declare who and what I am, and to support others to be who they are too. Psychics aren’t freaks, but normal people with a particularly well-honed sense that is available to us all.
My life and my work is now an open book. I share it all – the good, the bad and the ugly. It’s liberating. There’s no more stress. And in giving myself permission to live honestly as who I am, I help others to do that too. I surround myself with people who accept me for who I am, and I don’t care any more if you don’t like me, respect me or appreciate me or my gifts. I just won’t hang out with you, and I no longer put myself into situations or relationships where it is necessary to hide my truth or where you’ll put me down. Goodness, what a relief!
How about you? Are you Batman or Iron Man?
I know which one works better for me.
I can’t help it, I love myself too much. Ironman.
Because this happened: “And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” – Anaïs Nin
🙂
I’m mostly Ironman, but it’s funny how often life throws up reasons to turn into Batman. You’d think at nearly 50, I’d recognise the situations, but I do fall into them at times, only to have to Ironman myself out again later. 🙂 That urge to fit in, to just blend, dammit, is a very strong one!
I am so glad you allowed the real you out Nicole because love you just the way your are.
I suppose I am a bit of a batman . Through my youth trying so hard to be an extrovert , the life and soul of the party , instead deep down I way dying it was killing me because in reality I was such an introvert . I grew up with the ridiculous belief that the louder you are you get attention . Now I realise silence is golden …I love the quiet new me I can hear what people say now .
Cherryx
Nicole , I love this and just this morning I drew the New Beginnings card and journaled about stepping up and out and then I read your article and thought wow that was a synchronicity. I have been sitting between the two time to take off the cloak and become Iron Man. Love Suzie xxoo
I really like Batman ⭐️he has found a way in the world he lives in To still be the person at heart he needs to be, I can be who I need to be when I need to be it and also still be my authentic self, some people are just not ready for all of me but still we can both benefit from this relationship 🌸 it is not my place to judge their beliefs , they may change in time as they evolve and emerge into who they need to be 💐🐠🐠🐠 but what I l❤️Ve the most is when I’m around people that truely get me, that are me but they are few so in the meantime I’m slowly working on all the others I’m the big sister I’m here for them I got their back 🐅🐉🐉
I love this post..I am batman also but not really sure yet who Iron Man is though. Still discovering….I think I have tried to hide the real me for so long I need to dig deeper to find myself and my joy. This is a great reminder to become Iron Man.
Wow – this hit home. I’m batman for all the wrong reasons. I’ve gotten so good at concealing who I am that no one would ever suspect Bruce Wayne was anything other than what he appears to be. Usually I’m okay with it, but every so often Tony speaks up and says “what are we doing here?”
Great words. …. I am batman, working hard every day and getting closer to becoming Iron Man. There is still that little voice that says don’t do it. .. I keep Iron Man in my sights xxx
I know that little voice so well. It’s still important to be discerning, but to hide in shame instead of living with your light radiating? You deserve more than the constant battle, insecurity and fear that surrounds Batman’s struggle to conceal his true identity. Hugs and love xoxo
That line ‘Eventually illness stripped so much of my old self away that all that remained was my intuitive and psychic ability.’ speaks volumes to me Nicole!! 😌🙏💕 It’s amazing how much growth and change can occur from illness once you surrender.
I love this post. It speaks to my heart. I think I’ll need to share the batman quote on my instagtam account. I hope you don’t mind?
Share away! Much love, Nicole xx