“Be regular and orderly in your life, so that you may be violent and original in your work.” ~ Gustav Flaubert
Something interesting happened yesterday as I was pegging out the washing. Well, interesting to me, anyhow…
For all of my life I have shaken out each item, and pegged it neatly by corners or seams. I take a piece of laundry, dip my hand into the peg basket, and repeat, repeat, repeat until I’m done.
Yesterday was a big washing day. Five loads. And as I neared the end, clothesline groaning under the burden, I realised that somehow in the last little while I have become a peg matcher.
This is not something that EVER mattered to me. In fact, I wasn’t even aware that matching the colour of your pegs could be a deliberate act.
For decades I have simply taken random pegs. But yesterday I looked at the evidence. Here a pillowcase with two red pegs. There a sheet with two blue pegs. A t-shirt, two white pegs. Jeans, two more red pegs. And so it went. Not a single random allocation of colours.
Hmmmm.
And there’s more.
Suddenly, after endless months (years actually) of struggling with strategic story ideas, editing, plots and timelines I am creating complex interactions, and jotting down page after page of notes and wild imaginings. I can see where things need to be fixed or worked on. I can feel the flow of words again.
On the one hand I have become orderly, structured and with a yearning for systems and neatness.
On the other hand I am experiencing a riotous explosion of creative chaos and expansive thinking.
I’m putting it down to my lyme meds. As all of these horrid bacteria in my brain die off, the old grey matter appears to be functioning better. Oh my goodness. My brain is starting to work again!!!
It’s been a hard road on this treatment regime, and there’s so much left still to do. But I can honestly see improvement. I have more energy. My balance is improving. My heart is beginning to behave. The vista of my life is beginning to widen in front of me and possibilities I thought closed to me for ever are opening out. So, I will stick to these drugs. I will stick to this diet. I will persevere through the awfulness. Because something is working – I am slowly healing and being restored to myself.
Hooray for peg matching! I wonder what other changes there shall be?
