Don’t tell me how good you are. Show me…

Image from www.freeflavour.com

Image from www.freeflavour.com  PS: If you’re not sure what the Australian slang expression FIG JAM stands for , I suggest you google it… (Warning: swears alert!)

“As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them. ” ~ John F. Kennedy

“Talk is cheap.” ~ Anonymous

Today’s post has come about in part after watching a good friend be deeply wounded and disillusioned by the bullying actions of some people who loudly proclaim themselves as ‘enlightened and spiritual’.

Another friend is considering walking away from their life’s passion because of the vicious and mean-spirited ‘critique’ (it wasn’t constructive criticism, it was a poisonous personal attack) from an instructor at an invitation-only Master Class intended to guide emerging artists in front of a public audience at a large gallery. The instructor used my friend to make themselves look good and to extract a laugh or two from the crowd. The attack left my friend floundering in self-doubt, shame and humiliation, suffering anxiety attacks and questioning everything they’d previously held as true.

Most of the people I know who are incredibly good at what they do are also among the most humble, no matter their what field of endeavour. They sit in their integrity. They acknowledge their ability as fact, but have little need to bang their own drum because they are busy being actively engaged in the things that define them. As the saying goes, they walk their talk.

The yoga teacher who awakens each day to perform her personal meditation, pranayamas and asanas before eating her healthy yogini breakfast and getting ready for her classes. Who then comes home to eat her healthy dinner and concludes her day with more yoga, as an integral part of her daily life and philosophy.

Image from tumblr

Image from tumblr

The business mentor who has had years of experience building and running successful organisations, and who continues to sit on the Board of Directors of profitable companies.

Image from leParisien

Image from leParisien

The artist who still attends classes and workshops, and considers themselves constantly evolving; working on their craft even though they are at the top of their field and lauded by their peers.

'Painting in Gold' by Chad

‘Painting in Gold’ by Chad

Whether you are looking to form a relationship, seek employment or learn something new (and especially if you’re a starry-eyed beginner), listen with your eyes. Don’t be seduced by spin.  Don’t be sucked in by wild claims and promises. When we are eager and ready to begin the journey, our enthusiasm often nudges our discernment over into a corner.

Eagerness and newness make us all vulnerable. And sadly, I’ve seen many a beginner derailed because the people they put faith in to guide them on their journey trampled and stamped out that fledgling flame. Or didn’t give them the tools they need to have that promised ‘success’, and then put it all back on the learner when they fail. “Oh well,” they say, “you mustn’t want it enough, you don’t have the ability, your attitude’s all wrong.”

There are so many self-proclaimed ‘guru’s’ out there.  Who do you trust? How do you work out who can actually support your growth?

Image from www.zdnet.com

Image from www.zdnet.com

Word of mouth is a great place to start.

Trust your intuition.

And look for validity of the person’s abilities or claims. Do they walk their talk?  Are they respected within their industry or profession?  Do they have a public track record?  Do their ACTIONS align with their mouth?

The ‘Law of Attraction Wealth Creation Coach’ who has a mountain of debt and lives on credit cards?  Maybe not your best bet.

The ‘Parenting Expert’ who has never had children of their own, or even had them in their home for any length of time.  Really?

The ‘Write a Best-Seller Workshop’ run by the person who has never been published. Perhaps someone who has already walked the path you want to walk would have more concrete advice to share with you.

Even more than that, are they a person you can respect?  Do they have the sort of values and habits you aspire to? Do they treat others well? Are they leading by example?

In this age of social media it’s easy to set yourself up as an expert. In fact there are courses in how to do that!

Back in the day, experts had… wait for it… expertise.  And expertise was hard won through experience.

There’s no magical pill or quick fix in this life that is going to take you from the bottom to the top of your particular mountain. We all have our own path to walk, and everyone has something to teach us, whether that’s through a positive or a negative experience.

The people ahead of you in the climb up your mountain will have valuable insights to share based upon their own journeys. Those insights can save you time, move you ahead more quickly, and help you hone your own skills and talents. So be an active player in your own development.   Use your discernment.  Do your homework.  Make sure they really are higher up that mountain, and not someone standing at the bottom with a giant megaphone and some smooth-talking words…

Take on board what resonates for you, and leave the rest behind.

Above all, don’t take it all too seriously.  Life is an adventure – a big messy glorious adventure. And that’s a beautiful thing.

The Power of Mentors

Image from beginnerbaby.com

“The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own.”
 – Benjamin Disraeli

We all learn by modelling ourselves on others.  As babies we mimic our parents, copying everything they do until we learn to do those things for ourselves; facial expressions, gestures, words, movements…  The fastest way to have success in anything is always to find someone who is already doing that thing, and then copy what they do, or even better – engage with them and have them show you, or help you.

A mentor is someone who has walked the path before you, learned from their mistakes and become successful in their field. What makes them valuable to you is that THEY know how to do what you want to do because they’ve done it already. I have found business mentors, writing mentors (Hi, Doctor Kim!), money mentors and organic farming mentors to name a few. Sometimes my relationship with these people has been a tangible thing, and sometimes I’ve just watched what they’ve done or read their book – and copied what they did to become successful in their field.

I also work as a spiritual mentor with people who want to develop their metaphysical and psychic abilities. That’s a road I know very well.

Image from tananne.blogspot.com

It’s never too late to change or improve ourselves.  Today we’re going to use journalling to help us identify who we want to be, and who can help us achieve those dreams. Why not make yourself a nice cup of tea, or take yourself out to a coffee shop. With a beverage at your elbow, and a notebook and pen in hand, work through the following activity. You might surprise yourself at what you discover.

Journal Exercise:

Start by writing this passage at the top of your page.

Dear Universe, 

I trust that there is a Universal Wisdom which recognises my gifts and talents, that understands what outcomes and adventures are best for my Highest good, and that matches me to mentors best suited to helping me achieve my dreams.

I trust that there is someone out there who knows exactly what I need to do next. 

I am ready to embrace the possibility of a better life for myself. I am ready to move from struggle into flow.  I am ready to embrace abundance, in all its forms. I want you to know that I’m ready for whatever wonderful experiences and opportunities you send my way. I am ready to embrace change, and I am ready to embrace success. Thank you for the mentors I now attract into my life.

Now think of an area in your life where you would like to have success.  Don’t judge what comes next, and don’t over-think it.  Just trust that what you write will begin to create a greater sense of personal and spiritual awareness in your life.

Create a list of people who are leaders in this field, and that you can look up to. (if you don’t know who they are, then do a little research!)

Choose one of the people on your list and spend some time writing about WHY you admire this person, and what they do or have done that you would like to have more of in your own life.  Really allow yourself to explore this in detail, making the emotions you feel as you write this strong and real.

When you have finished, write about how you want YOUR life to look as you walk this same path.  Write down the outcomes you want for yourself, and how this will positively change your future, and the world around you.

Do this over a couple of days, using different mentors from your list each day.  Trust that as you build this connection through writing, the perfect teachers, courses, resources, mentors and support will begin to show up in your life.

Mr Miyagi and the Karate Kid Image from bell-street.com

NB: If you feel that you are walking a path of spiritual awakening right now, and you’d like to explore that further, I suggest you do this exercise while holding one of the following crystals:

  • Clear Quartz – for connecting with Guides and Higher Wisdom
  • Fluorite – for understanding your creative path, and for clear guidance with writing
  • Sodalite – for answers about relationships and knowing your own truth
  • Amethyst – for connecting into your spiritual gifts
  • Rhyolite – for channelled wisdoms – showing you that inner truth you find difficult to access on your own

 

One more thing…

You know more than you think you do.  How can you mentor others? Where can you reach out to people to share what you know, so that others can learn from YOUR experiences and mistakes?

Learning is love – so let’s spread the love around.  Helping others achieve their dreams always moves us closer to our own. ♥

Image from mandieandmedesigns.com

Manifesting New Directions and Opportunities

Image from relativityonline.com

If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with success unexpected in common hours.
Henry David Thoreau

It still amazes me how writing and visualising can create a magnetic pull in your life that attracts relationships, synchronicities and opportunities to you that are a match to your talents and intent. Writing has great power, and today’s exercise uses journal writing and visualisation as tools to help you open doors, invite opportunity and attract helpful people.

Expect answers and solutions. They often come from left field, and they often manifest themselves very quickly.  The more happy, positive and in flow you feel, the faster your solutions and opportunities will arrive. (If you’re not sure what makes you feel good, or how to get into that happy place, there is a great journal exercise and suggestions here.)

Journal Activity

Begin by writing the following passage into your own journal.  Feel free to use coloured inks if you wish, or anything else that brightens up your page.  Then choose one or more of the journal starters below and just start writing.  Let the words flow from your heart.  Don’t over-think anything, and most importantly don’t censor anything or limit yourself.  You can use the same journal starter more than once if it really resonates for you.

Use the page to create, imagine, and daydream your best self.  Feel yourself expanding out from the current limits of your life, dipping your toes in that glorious ocean of possibility.

Dear Universe, 

I believe there is more in store in life for me that what is in front of me right now. I have so many gifts to share, and I just need a little help to shine more brightly. I would appreciate some helpful people, some new opportunities, some great teachers and any other synchronicities or miracles you can throw my way.  I know some of these can be quickly sorted, and some may take more time. I am open to however this works.

I am excited about my future.  I await it with open arms.  I say YES to possibilities, and I am READY TO MOVE FORWARD in ways that bring me happiness and that best use my talents and gifts:

Choose from any of these journal starters and begin manifesting your new life:

  • Image from twistedsifter.com

    With a little bit of support I could

  • I have a great project in mind, but I’m a bit stuck about how to go forward.  What I really need is
  • One of the things holding me back right now is ____________ . If I could just get some help with this I could
  • I’d love to learn how to _______________ . I would love to attract a teacher who could
  • I believe in following your passions, and that if you do what you love, the money will follow.  One of my greatest passions is
  • I would love an opportunity to
  • If only someone would give me a chance I could
  • This situation isn’t working for me.  What I need is
  • I used to be so good at ______________ . I’d love to be able to
  • My greatest dream is
  • The sort of miracle I need right now is
  • I’m really stuck right now.  I need some help to turn my life around because
  • If I was brave enough I would
  • You know my talents and gifts greater than I do.  It would be really cool if
  • I have a super idea, but I don’t know how to bring it to life.  I need to find some
  • The big thing that’s stopped me living my dreams is _________________.  Can you help me find a way to
  • Get me out of here! I would love to be able to
  • I’m ready to say YES to

Image from euromag.ru

Daydreaming your way to a new life

When you have ten minutes all to yourself where you won’t be disturbed, go sit in a comfy chair, lie down on the bed, or spend some time in nature.  Take your journal with you! Open up this exercise and read one of your answers.  Use that as a starting point, close your eyes or gaze off into the distance and just daydream yourself in that ideal life.  See yourself having a great time, being successful and happy, getting the thing done, achieving the goal, getting the promotion, having the life or the lifestyle, winning the award, getting married, having that dream trip, riding off into the sunset… See that teacher coming into your life, or your soul mate. Really feel how wonderful that will be, to love and to use your gifts and to live your purpose.  An amazing and satisfying and fulfilling life.

Know that daydreaming and visualisation is a proven manifestation tool.  Indulge often!

Image from bridget247.blogspot.com

Journal for Spiritual Clarity and Connection 3 – All about my Emotions

One looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers, but with gratitude to those who touched our human feelings. The curriculum is so much necessary raw material, but warmth is the vital element for the growing plant and for the soul of the child.
~ Carl Jung

Week 3:  All About My Emotions

This week we are focussing on our emotions, our feelings and all that entails for us, with a special emphasis on feeling good.  Our plan is to understand and connect with our emotions; our relationships, triggers, dreams and hopes and how our surroundings influence us.

Journal Exercise:

Journal relationships this week.  Identify areas where you need to forgive or move on.

Work out who/what supports you and makes you feel good, and who/what brings you down.

Identify triggers for positive feelings, and triggers for negative feelings/low self worth.  Limit the negative triggers!

Use any of these starters to help you:

  • How I feel right now is…
  • What I need to do to improve how I feel now is…
  • One person who always makes me feel good is…
  • The thing in my life I need to let go of is…
  • The person in my life I need to let go of is…
  • I still can’t stop thinking about…
  • The stuff that always brings me down includes…
  • One of the happiest times of my life was…
  • I’m still proud of the fact that…
  • I shed far too many tears over…
  • The most powerful teacher of how NOT to do things in my life has been…
  • The most powerful example of how I’d like to be is…
  • When I think of my pet, I feel…
  • A place that evokes positive memories for me is…
  • A time in my life when I felt unstoppable was…
  • The person I am still mad at the most is…
  • The person I need to forgive most is…
  • When I think about people who suck me dry, or leave me feeling drained and bad about myself, these people come to mind…
  • If I could name the cheerleaders in my life, the people who have supported and encouraged me over the years, they would include…
  • Food that always makes me feel good about myself is…
  • Food that might feel good in the short term but that triggers guilt, low self-worth or uncomfortable physical symptoms is…
  • Music that uplifts me includes…
  • Movies that always make me feel good are…

Activity:

Overhaul your bedroom and lounge areas so that they reflect your style and are uplifting and nurturing.

Play music that inspires you. 

Introduce colour into your clothing and your life.  Get some sunshine, and spend time in nature.

Clean up your house, your car and your energy!

Contact an old friend, or do something to make new friends.  Spend time with people you love, and who love you!

(This image by vichie81)