About That Sense Of Impending Doom…

“You never know what worse luck your bad luck has saved you from.”  ~ Cormac McCarthy

Did you see my post about psychic anxiety and that sense of impending doom I was suffering from? Well, it’s quite gone now. Perhaps due to the fact that Ben and I were involved in a high-speed impact traffic accident on Wednesday morning. We were stationary at a red light and someone rammed us from behind, doing between 70 and 80 kilometres per hour, the impact sending our own car twenty metres across the intersection.

Luckily the road ahead was empty and we were wearing seatbelts.

We’re both okay. I have severe whiplash and bruising, some torn ligamanets and a very sore jaw from the ashtray full of coins which flew out and hit me on the chin. The car’s a write-off. But hey, it could have been a lot worse.

Thanks for all the messages worrying about why I’ve been quiet. Now you know why.

Much love, Nicole ❤ xx

Premonitions, Traffic Jams and Prayers

Image by David Kapernick – The Sunday Mail

Recently I was driving from my farm back to Brisbane, a two hour drive – mostly along a highway – so that I could begin a stretch of work.

The trip started well.  I made good time, it was a beautiful day, and I was enjoying some music, singing along as I drove.  The first hour passed quickly and I began thinking about the next day’s psychic appointments, and the clients I’d be seeing.

But then I started to feel a little nauseous. I began to feel a little anxious.

There was no reason to.  The traffic was flowing freely. The weather was perfect.  I was well rested and stress-free, and it was a beautiful day.

My palms began to sweat.

I was travelling in the far right-hand lane. That’s the faster lane in Australia. Suddenly I began to feel very exposed and unsafe, with the traffic roaring past in the opposite direction just metres from me, separated by a garden bed, and in places a wire rope barrier of sorts.

I felt worse and worse.  That horrible premonition of impending doom. I wondered if I should call my husband, just in case…

But that was silly. There was nothing wrong.

It got to the point where I could no longer stay in that outside lane. I dropped back into a middle lane, and drove more slowly.  Still I couldn’t get that feeling out of my mind, that the traffic on the other side of the road was dangerous – too fast, too close. I began to drive strategically, so that I was shielded from them by a car in the outside lane.

After a while even that didn’t feel any better. I dropped over another lane, so there were two lanes and more cars between me and the oncoming traffic on the other side of the highway. I felt like I was in a war zone, nervously anticipating the next attack.  By now I wasn’t even joking with myself that I might be a bit mental.  Instead I was working very hard to stay calm, and to stay on the road. I felt like I was about to be hit by an oncoming car at any minute.  I could see it and feel it as if it was unfolding in front of me.

Finally the premonition overwhelmed me, and I actually pulled right over to the left and into an emergency stopping bay.  My heart was pounding, and I was close to tears.

I stayed that way for about ten minutes, hands clenched on the steering wheel, unable to drive. Eventually the feeling passed, and I nudged my car back onto the bitumen.

Just around the bend in the road the traffic slowed.  Then it stopped.  I turned on the radio.  Traffic banked up all around me.  A  sea of stationary vehicles. They broadcast a traffic report – just ahead of us a car had left the other side of the highway and crashed through the barrier before plowing into five cars.  It was a very serious accident, and the highway was now closed in both directions.

I shut down my engine.  I called my husband. And then I prayed for all of the people involved in the accident, the emergency services workers who were helping them, and the families and friends who would pick up the pieces.

Image by Chris Higgins – Quest Newspapers

I really believe that my premonition saved my life.  I felt simultaneously guilty and relieved. Guilty, because I was safe.  Relieved, because it hadn’t happened to me.

It was a long, slow trip back to Brisbane, taking nearly five hours. It was agonising to edge past the crash site when they finally opened one lane to traffic again. I could feel the crash, I could feel the panic and the horror and the finality. The feeling didn’t leave me. The people didn’t leave me. That’s what it’s like for me, being psychic.  It’s a blessing, and a raw wound.

But I was safe.  I went back to my home in Brisbane, lit some candles, took out my Tibetan Prayer Bowl, and meditated and prayed until bed.