Is Work Moving You Toward Or Away From What You Want? – Monday Oracle 10 April 2017

“I tend to be… they say ‘workaholic,’ which I just find to be ‘motivated.’ ”
~ Sarah Hay

Hello, Lovelies!

Here’s the oracle card I have chosen this Monday, and my take on the energetic outlook for the week ahead. I use any oracle or tarot cards shown as a prompt for channelled messages and my own intuitive wisdom, so my take is sometimes quite different to the meaning found in a book. ‘Workaholic’ is from the Chakra Wisdom Oracle Deck by Tori Hartman.

If you read my forecast for April, you’ll remember that April has strong energy for believing in ourselves and reclaiming our direction.

So, what gifts does Workaholic bring for you this week?

This is a week for honestly evaluating how we spend our time.

Ask anyone who truly loves what they do, and they will most likely tell you that they work long hours, that they often wake up thinking about their work, and go to bed still thinking about it too.That’s not workaholism – that’s passion. That’s total engagement with an idea or a vision. Where others might see sacrifice or lack of balance, that person sees only their calling and being in flow with that thing. They are compelled and it adds to rather than subtracts from their lives.

Have you ever lost track of time while doing something you enjoy? That’s the kind of energy I mean.

Some of us work hard because there are bills to pay. We end up working in jobs we hate to pay for things we can’t really afford. Life becomes an endless rat race.

Then there’s work as a drug. Every spare hour is filled with some kind of job. And we are the ones who fill up those hours. This goes beyond being busy. (No, this doesn’t even have to be paid work. I’m just talking busy-ness. Even retirees can experience this.) We sign up for more and more and more. In fact, many of us have grown up believing that this is the measure of a successful person, or at least what it takes to be successful. But is it? This is workaholism – a mind-numbing addiction that is just as deadly as alcohol or drugs – because it keeps us from feeling our feelings and facing whatever it is that we are avoiding. It also ramps up our stress, weakens our bodies, invites illness and destroys lives.

Sometimes we end up in that workaholism space by choice, but often it sneaks up on us. Even people who love what they do can fall into this trap, and then find themselves facing burnout and falling out of love with their dream because they forgot to make it sustainable. Workaholism creates numbness and exhaustion so that we stop asking ourselves if this is what we want, or how we want to work and live, or if we would rather choose something else.

The energy of this week supports you asking yourself that very question. Is this the life I want for myself? Is this the work I want? Is there room in my life for living and doing what I love to do? How do I want to spend my time? What matters to me?

Find some time for yourself this week, and ask yourself those questions. And if you’re not happy with the answers begin to make some changes. Look to simplify your life, to find some time for the things that matter, and for the underestimated joy of just having spare time for living.

 

Helpful essential oils? 

Young Living’s Clarity essential oil blend, or a combination (or singly!) of any of Basil, Bergamot, Cedarwood and Lavender. Clarity essential oil blend promotes focus and clear thinking, but it’s calming and uplifting at the same time. I love this oil, and it’s my oil of choice in my diffuser this week. You can find all the oils here.

Holding you, as always, in my thoughts, prayers and meditations, and intending for a you a life of abundance and joy, where you are no longer limited by your doubts.

All my love,

Nicole ❤ xx

Image from www.blazeyourown.com

Reality Check – A Reminder of What Really Matters

Image from Mummy Quotes

Image from Mummy Quotes

“Most of us spend too much time on what is urgent and not enough time on what is important.” 
~ Stephen R. Covey

 

I have a beautiful girlfriend who is the ultimate career woman. She has worked for the same corporation for 25 years, starting at the very bottom and working her way up. She is one of those women who has climbed the ladder and broken through the glass ceiling. For twenty five years she has devoted herself to this organisation, and enjoyed a meteoric rise. She’s a stunning project manager, and she gets things done. They always call on her in a crisis. There is always a crisis. She works insane hours, lives and breathes company business, and is paid accordingly.

In the middle of this she has managed to complete a degree, an MBA, and to marry and have two children. She always wanted to have children but by the time she and her husband started trying for babies in her late thirties, pregnancy just wasn’t happening. She has two beautiful daughters, aged 3 and 6, both from IVF, which was a long and difficult process. It took many attempts to bring those little girls into the world.

No, this is not a post about leaving babies til the last minute.

It’s a post about leaving life til the last minute.

You see, my friend sent me a frantic text yesterday morning, and then called me as soon as she knew I was awake.

I haven’t seen her for a couple of years. You know how things are when people get busy.

She had news. The worst kind. She’s been diagnosed with aggressive and advanced ovarian cancer. It’s inoperable. They think she may have twelve weeks to live, give or take. There’s no time left for treatment. Only for palliative care.

She started losing weight eighteen months ago and put it down to stress. But secretly she was also thrilled. She had put on plenty of weight during each of her pregnancies and had never been able to get it back off again. Still, her tummy stayed round and bloated.

She hasn’t felt her best since the babies were born. But that’s normal for busy mums, isn’t it? Anyway, she always said to me that she was too busy to have the luxury of a sick day.

My friend left it so long to do something about the pelvic pain, the back aches, the bladder leaks, the fatigue, that when she finally made the time to see a doctor it was all too late. She is riddled with cancer. It’s in her bowel, her brain, her liver, her lungs, her bones. Everywhere.

What should she do, my friend asked me. She has recently moved her husband, two little children and their nanny to yet another new city while she works on a difficult merger. They haven’t really settled in yet. She began to tell me all about the work…

Screw the work, I said. Come home. Come home to your family and your husband’s family. Come home to the people who love you, and who can take care of you all. Forget the responsibilities. Now is the time to focus on what truly matters. Living. Loving. Drinking up every last moment. Creating the best kinds of memories. Gifting yourself and your loved ones the time you have left.

She kept crying, over and over, I thought I’d have more time. God, it almost undid me.

All her working life my friend has put things to one side; holidays, celebrations, lazy Sundays, time out with family and friends, because she though that one day she’d be in a magical place where there was plenty of time, and plenty of money and plenty of life left to enjoy all those good things.

heart

Life is so short. So precious. None of us ever really know how much time we have.

Oh, it breaks my heart, dear ones. It just breaks my heart.

I’m going to take a few days off blogging, while I support my friend through this next part of her journey.

Please, look after yourselves. Look after your health and your loved ones. Work out what matters and spend time on those relationships and activities. It’s the journey, as much as the destination. You know that, don’t you?

That great behemoth of a corporation my friend works for will get by just fine without her. She might not have realised it, but she is expendable to them, although I’m sure they’ll miss her, and her talents.

Her husband and kids? I’m sure they can’t say the same.

My friend, ever the one to seek productive outcomes from any situation, asked me to write this post. She hoped it may serve as a reality check for people like her, who’ve strayed too far from what really counts.

Will you hold her and her family in your thoughts and prayers? Her name’s Julie, and she sure could use a little extra love and light right now.

Thank you.

Image from Paper Masters

Image from Paper Masters

When you don’t know what you want…

“Even though there are no ways of knowing for sure, there are ways of knowing for pretty sure.” 
~ Lemony Snicket

Yesterday’s post was all about using your imagination to create a day designed around one thing – giving yourself emotional satisfaction and pleasure. I was thrilled with your responses – it’s such a fun game and I really hope you take the time to play it from time to time, on your own or with loved ones.

I also received a trail of sad little messages in my inbox yesterday. They were all similar, but this one sums them up:

Dear Nicole, while I loved the idea of your magical carpet ride I couldn’t think of a single place I wanted to go, or any food that I would eat, or even who I would be with. The more I’ve thought about it, the more I’ve drawn a blank. Is there something wrong with me? I feel like such a failure. Please don’t take this the wrong way. I love your blog, but I don’t think I’m any good at imagination games. All I know how to do is work. I’m just really stuck where I am. 🙁 Could you maybe blog about that?

Oh dear.

Whenever we have that empty feeling, or it seems there is a big wall between us and that place where we know what we want it’s time to pay attention.

Image from tumblr

Image from tumblr

Common reasons for not knowing what we want include:

  1. Being physically, emotionally or mentally exhausted.
  2. Being in Survival Mode – survival mode is where we are functioning on reserve energy; doing the bare minimum to sustain life, pay bills and get through the day. In survival mode we think we cannot afford to waste even a shred of extra energy on anything non-vital.
  3. Being a low priority in our own lives. That’s a self-worth issue, honey!
  4. Having an ingrained belief that we are not worthy of pleasure.
  5. Having an ingrained belief that we can’t have fun until the work is done. Newsflash, people – the work will NEVER be done!
  6. Running on limited resources and worrying that if we don’t make the perfect choice we will waste time, money, effort or satisfaction. We are risk averse. Better to stick with something safe and reliable, even if it’s boring, than risk choosing something that doesn’t deliver, or, even worse, brings criticism from others. (Note – this is also a red flag that you are heading towards Survival Mode!)
  7. Fear that our choices will be judged, criticized or belittled by others. When we live in fear long enough we learn not to be visible or to do anything that may draw attention or criticism. We let others make the decisions for us.
  8. Social and cultural isolation – where our world has shrunk so small that we aren’t even aware of what choices might be available to us.
  9. Believing we don’t deserve pleasure, because of a past action, decision or some other choice we have made on which we judge ourselves negatively.
  10. Fear around taking time for ourselves or spending money on ourselves because we believe that unless we are 100% productive all the time we won’t be loved or lovable.

Sometimes all it takes to break free of this stuckness is to simply acknowledge that we ARE stuck, and to feel around for WHY we cannot connect to dreams any more.

Without hope, without dreams for tomorrow, life becomes colourless and meaningless.

If you’re one of those people who is stuck and don’t know what you want, that’s okay. Don’t be too hard on yourself. What you need is some inspiration.

So_Precious_FKG-590x548

So precious by Georgina Hart

So read books, watch movies, go to travel agents and get some brochures, or browse online. Research and ask others what they’ve enjoyed. Try to make a little room in your life for possibility. Make a little room in your life for self nurture and self care. Reach out and make some new connections. You’ll be amazed at how, once you give your heart and imagination a little room, that the road begins to open up in front of you again.

This technique of ‘exploration through information and connection’ works for fantasy magical carpet days, relationships, holidays, jobs, homes, and other matters close to your heart. Why don’t you try it and see for yourself?

Much, much love to you, ♥ Nicole xoxo

dare_to_dream__by_this_is_the_life2905-d3fn4ea

Feeding the Heart Chakra

Energy of the Heart Chakra

The heart chakra, an energy centre located at our heart, is an open doorway, the anchor for our soul, and the seat of love. Its colour is a magnificent shade of rich emerald green.

When your heart chakra is open and balanced you will be in a space of self-love, self-nurture, generosity, kindness, humour, empathy, non-judgement, happiness, tolerance, expansion, optimism and FLOW.  You’ll see beauty everywhere!

When the chakra is unbalanced you may experience too much empathy,and hypersensitivity to the moods and emotions of others – where you will process these emotions as your own or feel responsible for them.  This is draining emotionally, physically and spiritually.

When the chakra is closed down you may experience loneliness, depression and anxiety, a sense of not belonging, shy away from intimacy and commitment, be overtly critical of self and others, be defensive and even paranoid. This lack of flow can create addiction, including workaholism, because addictions mask and numb PAIN.

In all instances, what the heart chakra needs is LOVE, and to feel good. Treat yourself and others with kindness, and spend time listening to your heart.  Your heart holds all the wisdom of your soul, it truly knows what is best for you and what direction best serves you.  All you need to do is tune in to that wisdom. That’s what we’re going to explore this week!

Activity: Feeding Your Heart Chakra:

Food contains energy, trapped sunlight, known as Bio-photonic Energy.  It also contains a myriad of chemicals, vitamins, minerals, proteins, carbohydrates, fats and all sorts of amazing properties, many of which are not yet known or understood by us. Consciously incorporate some of these heart-chakra friendly foods in your diet, and begin to FEEL the difference.

For the Heart Chakra think green!  Salads, steamed vegetables, green oils, juices and smoothies.  These foods are full of calcium, magnesium, iodine, selenium, sulphur, essential fatty acids, B group vitamins and Vitamin C – all great for heart health, cleansing of the  blood, and general circulation.

Spinach, silverbeet, artichokes, asparagus, broccolini, celery, cucumbers, green capsicums (peppers), leeks, lettuce, all edible green leaves, winter melon, bitter melon, okra, watercress, green beans, broccoli, zucchinis, snow peas, green peas, kale, rocket, chard, asian greens such as bok choi and choi sum, parsley, coriander, shallots, basil, green pesto, sage, thyme, brussel sprouts, avocado, spirulina, seaweeds, cabbage, limes, honeydew melons, kiwi fruit, green grapes, green apples, green pears,  fennel, olives, extra virgin olive oil – cold pressed, hemp oil, green tea, barley greens, pepitas, pistachio nuts, capers, rosemary, green lentils, chlorella, aloe vera, oregano, green lipped mussels, wheatgrass, all forms of sprouts.

One of my favourite recipes for a green smoothie is one cup of coconut milk (or coconut water and flesh from young coconut) and a few handfuls of young spinach leaves, a frozen banana, dash of organic vanilla and a spoonful of spirulina.

And for a beginners green juice you can’t go past apple, cucumber, zucchini (trust me – it makes it so creamy and delish!), parsley, celery and a hint of ginger.

Journalling:

One of the most powerful ways to work with the energy of the Heart Chakra is to recognise what makes you happy.  Today, write a list of things you enjoy, are grateful for, and that make you smile and feel good.

If you have time, and feel so inclined, create a collaged double-page spread in your journal of pictures, images and words that uplift you and speak to your heart. If you like, go crazy and make a full-sized dreamboard.

Simple Meditation:

Picture your heart chakra as a rose bud, tightly furled and lusciously green, and then opening into a beautiful red rose with the most gorgeous fragrance. Do this once or daily.  And use some rose scent or a fresh rose to anchor this new energy!

This short clip has an excellent visual for you:

Above all, this week, choose to feel good.  Even if that means you don’t win the argument, or get the last word in, or be ‘right’.  Let this week be about flow, and ease and listening to your HEART.

Focus on you.  Focus on happiness, and on drawing into your world more of the energies and activities that nurture you, uplift you, make you smile, make you FEEL all of that incredible love that is within you and all around you.

The happier and better you feel, the higher your vibration.  The higher your vibration, the more good you attract into your life. Trust me on this – it really works.

I’ll be meditating all week on heart healing and helping you open up to the wisdom and love within you.  Know that you are much loved ♥ Nicole xx

PS – Remember to leave a comment, so you can be in the running to win my beautiful Heart Chakra healing necklace. Details and picture here