Don’t tell me how good you are. Show me…

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Image from  PS: If you’re not sure what the Australian slang expression FIG JAM stands for , I suggest you google it… (Warning: swears alert!)

“As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them. ” ~ John F. Kennedy

“Talk is cheap.” ~ Anonymous

Today’s post has come about in part after watching a good friend be deeply wounded and disillusioned by the bullying actions of some people who loudly proclaim themselves as ‘enlightened and spiritual’.

Another friend is considering walking away from their life’s passion because of the vicious and mean-spirited ‘critique’ (it wasn’t constructive criticism, it was a poisonous personal attack) from an instructor at an invitation-only Master Class intended to guide emerging artists in front of a public audience at a large gallery. The instructor used my friend to make themselves look good and to extract a laugh or two from the crowd. The attack left my friend floundering in self-doubt, shame and humiliation, suffering anxiety attacks and questioning everything they’d previously held as true.

Most of the people I know who are incredibly good at what they do are also among the most humble, no matter their what field of endeavour. They sit in their integrity. They acknowledge their ability as fact, but have little need to bang their own drum because they are busy being actively engaged in the things that define them. As the saying goes, they walk their talk.

The yoga teacher who awakens each day to perform her personal meditation, pranayamas and asanas before eating her healthy yogini breakfast and getting ready for her classes. Who then comes home to eat her healthy dinner and concludes her day with more yoga, as an integral part of her daily life and philosophy.

Image from tumblr

Image from tumblr

The business mentor who has had years of experience building and running successful organisations, and who continues to sit on the Board of Directors of profitable companies.

Image from leParisien

Image from leParisien

The artist who still attends classes and workshops, and considers themselves constantly evolving; working on their craft even though they are at the top of their field and lauded by their peers.

'Painting in Gold' by Chad

‘Painting in Gold’ by Chad

Whether you are looking to form a relationship, seek employment or learn something new (and especially if you’re a starry-eyed beginner), listen with your eyes. Don’t be seduced by spin.  Don’t be sucked in by wild claims and promises. When we are eager and ready to begin the journey, our enthusiasm often nudges our discernment over into a corner.

Eagerness and newness make us all vulnerable. And sadly, I’ve seen many a beginner derailed because the people they put faith in to guide them on their journey trampled and stamped out that fledgling flame. Or didn’t give them the tools they need to have that promised ‘success’, and then put it all back on the learner when they fail. “Oh well,” they say, “you mustn’t want it enough, you don’t have the ability, your attitude’s all wrong.”

There are so many self-proclaimed ‘guru’s’ out there.  Who do you trust? How do you work out who can actually support your growth?

Image from

Image from

Word of mouth is a great place to start.

Trust your intuition.

And look for validity of the person’s abilities or claims. Do they walk their talk?  Are they respected within their industry or profession?  Do they have a public track record?  Do their ACTIONS align with their mouth?

The ‘Law of Attraction Wealth Creation Coach’ who has a mountain of debt and lives on credit cards?  Maybe not your best bet.

The ‘Parenting Expert’ who has never had children of their own, or even had them in their home for any length of time.  Really?

The ‘Write a Best-Seller Workshop’ run by the person who has never been published. Perhaps someone who has already walked the path you want to walk would have more concrete advice to share with you.

Even more than that, are they a person you can respect?  Do they have the sort of values and habits you aspire to? Do they treat others well? Are they leading by example?

In this age of social media it’s easy to set yourself up as an expert. In fact there are courses in how to do that!

Back in the day, experts had… wait for it… expertise.  And expertise was hard won through experience.

There’s no magical pill or quick fix in this life that is going to take you from the bottom to the top of your particular mountain. We all have our own path to walk, and everyone has something to teach us, whether that’s through a positive or a negative experience.

The people ahead of you in the climb up your mountain will have valuable insights to share based upon their own journeys. Those insights can save you time, move you ahead more quickly, and help you hone your own skills and talents. So be an active player in your own development.   Use your discernment.  Do your homework.  Make sure they really are higher up that mountain, and not someone standing at the bottom with a giant megaphone and some smooth-talking words…

Take on board what resonates for you, and leave the rest behind.

Above all, don’t take it all too seriously.  Life is an adventure – a big messy glorious adventure. And that’s a beautiful thing.

What to do when someone doesn’t like you

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Image from

“You have people come into your life shockingly and surprisingly. You have losses that you never thought you’d experience. You have rejection and you have learn how to deal with that and how to get up the next day and go on with it.” ~ Taylor Swift

I’ve had so many private messages about this subject since yesterday’s post that I thought it timely to address the issue of what to do when someone doesn’t like you.

This is an especially hard subject for sensitive people. We don’t have that thick skin that helps protect others. But one of the great truths of life is this:

There will always be people who love us. There will always be people who like us. There will always be people who are indifferent. There will be people who don’t know us yet, many of whom never will. There will be people who don’t like us. There will be people who don’t get us at all, or who are strongly positioned against us ( I choose not to use the word ‘hate’). Life covers the full spectrum of experience from closeness to rejection.

It hurts to be rejected.  It hurts to be misunderstood. It hurts to be judged. But there are some things we can do to help us cope better.

  1. Remember that what other people think of you is none of your business.
  2. Understand that sometimes we misinterpret another person’s signals or emotions and we may be incorrect in thinking they don’t like us.
  3. Know that humans are complex and irrational. Someone might not like you because you disagree on politics or same-sex-marriage or which direction a toilet roll should roll. You might remind them of their mother, or their mean next-door-neighbour, or the first date who rejected THEM. They might not even make a conscious connection to that fact – instead, it is a protection mechanism for them that has NOTHING to do with you.
  4. Sometimes people like us, or they certainly don’t dislike us, but they behave differently to our expectations, and we judge their ‘love’ based on measuring their behaviour against what we have come to expect from other people.  For example, some families hug, and some don’t. If we come from a family of huggers, we might interpret people not hugging us as a sign of rejection, when in fact non-huggers just have a different approach to relationships.
  5. Embrace the fact that you don’t need to ‘fix’ it. Of course if it’s an ex and you have to share parenting, or it’s your spouse’s parents, you may need to find a way to exist within each other’s Universe that minimizes stress and aggravation. There are resources and techniques to help us cope with difficult people. Seek them out.
  6. Stay safe. Value yourself and your physical, emotional and spiritual well-being above what other people think of you.
  7. Don’t hang out with people who are mean, who put you down and treat you like dirt. Seriously. Go read a book, watch a movie, learn a language, make art. Do anything other than knowingly put yourself back into situations that distress and devalue you.

As to strategies for ‘winning people over’? Is it worth putting that much energy into? We can become so obsessed with the one relationship that isn’t working that we neglect the ones that are. Or we keep modifying our behaviour, trying to change into someone we’re not, until we no longer know who we are anymore. It might be time to look at why you have such a strong need to be liked, or why you are reacting so strongly to the current situation.


If you are pushed into a fear or flight response, if you find yourself moving into anxiety, illness or depression as a result of a difficult relationship seek counselling.  Not to ‘heal’ the relationship, but to give you strategies for better coping with the situation, or helping you walk away, if that is what’s needed.

The more that you develop a healthy respect and regard for yourself, and find relationships that support you, the less it will bother you when someone else doesn’t like you.

Something that has helped me enormously is to realise that everyone is on their own path, and our paths may go in opposite directions or may only marginally intersect. That’s okay. We are all different and that’s what makes life so interesting. It’s all about choices. No need to take it so personally. You don’t have to like them, and they don’t have to like you.

two paths

Practice emotional maturity, kindness and use good manners. There is no need to return the dislike or negative emotion. Limit your exposure or walk away. Always step away from aggression and bullying, or call it in – no-one needs to put up with that kind of behaviour – whether it’s in the workplace or your own family.

Know that some relationships will change over time.  People can grow away from each other, or towards each other.  Some friendships take time to develop. One of the happiest couples I know (and they’ve been married over twenty years!) couldn’t stand each other when they first met.

From a spiritual perspective, this has worked for me with great effect:

Build up a feeling of love and compassion in your heart. Then think of the person who doesn’t like you. Hold their face in your mind.  Say to yourself “I forgive you. I love you and I bless you and I set you free.  Go well in the world.” Really do all you can to mean those words as you say them.

Then think of yourself, and say “I love you (insert your name).  I forgive you and I bless you and I set you free.  All is well.”

I’ll let Yoda and William Shakespeare have the last word…


When your Heart says No…

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“We need to find the courage to say ‘NO’ to the things and people that are not serving us if we want to rediscover ourselves and live our lives with authenticity.”  ~ Barbara De Angelis

We’ve all been there.  The place that ticks all the boxes.  The partner our friends and parents love.  The dream job.  The thing we thought we really wanted.  The place we always figured we’d be happy to be…

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But what happens when you meet that dream lover, or find yourself in that perfect place, or finally achieve the big thing, only to find that something’s missing?

You scratch your head, and check the boxes.




It all looks good. It all adds up.

So why do you feel like you’re dead inside?

Life isn’t always about finding a partner/job/solution that ticks all your boxes.  After all, wasn’t it your HEAD that made the list up in the first place? Or, maybe even worse, it’s your Mother’s list, or your teacher’s, or something you found in a self-help book or some corner of the internet.

If it’s not feeling right, it’s because your HEART isn’t engaged.  And that’s where the magic happens!

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Think back over your life, and you’ll soon know what I mean.  Remember the outfit you loved so much because it transformed you somehow.  The one you never would have chosen for yourself, because you didn’t think that colour suited you. But once you tried it on, you knew…

What about your unlikely best friend, back at school?  The one so opposite to you, and when you got together all you did was laugh and laugh. You came from different backgrounds, you looked completely different to one another, but you both were crazy about that one thing that brought you together in the first place.

Remember the weird combination of flavours that had you totally hooked at that little Thai street cafe on the last night of your overseas holiday – your whole life up until that point had been about the plain sort of food your grandma cooked.  Since then you’ve sought out food like that back home. You even COOK food like that at home.

Life is a glorious adventure, and it was never meant to fit so neatly into a plan, or a list or a flow chart. Certainly not one that is safe, sensible and completely without risk.  All the best stuff in life is the stuff you never could have made up for yourself.

Hearts have a wisdom all their own.  And the wisdom they share with you might not make any sense at all to your brain.  Or to anyone else’s brain. (But whose life is this anyway?)

Heart wisdom isn’t logical and yet it usually shows you the best path to happiness in life.

When your heart says NO, pay attention. When all the boxes are ticked, and there’s no gleam in your eye, no enthusiasm in your step, your heart is trying very hard to tell you something.

Haven’t you ever heard the expression ‘my heart’s just not in it’? That’s your heart saying NO.

When your heart says no, it’s asking you to stretch, it’s encouraging you to grow. That might feel a little strange at first.  It might even feel a little wrong.  Don’t confuse fear with intuition… What we come to love often looks or feels different to what we had expected in our mind.

When your heart says NO it’s because it understands that there is a YES just round the next corner, and if you say wrongly say YES to a NO, you close yourself off to the magic and miracles that give us the best and most memorable parts of life.

Tune in today.  Ask your heart.  Is it a YES?  Is it a NO?

When your heart says NO, be brave.  Move on…

Day 8 – Gratitude Challenge

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“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.”

~ Innerspace

Congratulations! You’ve completed your first full week of gratitude. Well done. ♥  You are gently retraining your brain to remove resistance to flow, and installing habits of appreciation and abundant thinking.

We are all looking for greater flow in our lives. When we are in ‘flow’ life just works, somehow.  We find the right job, the money is there, we have love and music and contentment in our hearts. When we are in flow doors open… miracles happen… life just feels good.

The greatest obstacle to flow is resistance. Resistance isn’t something external to us. It is our internal dialogue.  I’m sure you know what I mean.  That thing we do where our head gets filled with grumbles and complaints:

Not fair.  Too hard.  No fun.  Not enough.  Not worthy. Too much money.  Not enough money.  Too fat. Not smart. How come she gets that? How come he got that? When’s it my turn?  It’s never my turn. I’m an idiot. I can’t believe I did that. I don’t deserve that. That good thing will never happen for me.

Can you feel how anti-magnetic those kind of thoughts are to the good stuff?

Can you feel how magnetic these thoughts are to more cranky, miserable and impoverished kinds of events, relationships and outcomes?

Image from photobucket

The antidote to resistance is…

Yes, you know what I’m going to say…

Finding an attitude of gratitude.

When we can find something to be grateful for, no matter how difficult our current circumstances, we begin to ease ourselves out of that struggle energy and back into flow.

So let’s get into that affirming energy that allows us to move from flow to allowing, by counting our Blessings.

Daily Gratitude Practice – Count Our Blessings and Use our Gratitude Rock

If you need a detailed reminder of the process, you can review it here in Day 1 of the Gratitude Challenge.

  1. List five Blessings in your journal, explaining why you are grateful for each one.
  2. Count your Blessings off on your fingers, summoning positive emotion and saying Thank You from your heart for each one.
  3. Tonight before you go to sleep, hold your Gratitude Rock and affirm I am richly Blessed. I have an Abundance of Good in my life. Visualise one thing you have been grateful for today. Swell that positive energy up in your heart like a beautiful golden light, and give a heart-felt Thank You, Thank You, Thank You to the Universe, then imagine a tiny shower of golden light travelling from your heart into your Gratitude Rock.
  4. Still holding your Gratitude Rock, bless your fellow travellers on this Gratitude Journey by sending them golden light, and saying Thank you.  I Bless You.  I intend for you Love, Miracles and Abundance. Know that as you are saying this for them, they are also saying this for you. Feel that connection and gratitude and know that there is real love and support for you here. Place your rock back beside your bed, and go to sleep, cocooned in this good energy.

If all you do each day is these first four steps, know that is enough.

If you feel especially flat, then carry your Gratitude Rock with you, or lie/sit in bed at the start or end of the day, and hold it over your heart so that its energy can recharge you.

If you have an abundance of gratitude and feel-good energy, send some extra to your fellow travellers on this journey, with the intent to uplift those who need it. You can do this as easily as closing your eyes and imagining or intending it be so.

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The beautiful thing about this challenge is that we are all in this together, helping and energising each other, and amplifying our collective energy.

Are you ready to dissolve more resistance?  If your answer is yes, then join me for today’s additional Challenge:

I’m So Happy For You, and Thankful for Your Success!

Think of something you really want.  It could be a soul mate, a great promotion, a publishing contract, a gold medal…

It’s okay that you don’t have it yet. Someone else does.  And their having it proves that it’s also possible for you to have it.  The energy of their success is something you can draw to you and make your own, because gratitude amplifies the energy of what we are thankful for and creates it in our own lives.

Today, think of something you really want. Then think of someone who has it already.

Maybe you want a loving and lasting relationship, and your grandparents still hold hands and adore each other after 50 years of marriage. Hold a picture of them, and of their beautiful relationship in your mind. Swell your heart with feel-good emotion and gratitude for their loving relationship.  Then say “I’m so happy for you, and for your success. I am thankful for the energy of a loving marriage.” Really feel those words, and mean them with all your heart.

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Maybe you want a publishing contract.  Think of an author whose books and success you admire. (This won’t work if you are resentful of them or jealous of them, or think their books suck.)  Hold a picture of the author, and of their incredible sales figures and wonderful books in your mind. Swell your heart with feel-good emotion and gratitude for their success as writers.  Then say “I’m so happy for you, and for your success. I am thankful for the energy of being a successful published author.” Really feel those words, and mean them with all your heart.

Whatever it is that you want to experience, find ways to be grateful for that energy as it already exists in the Universe. There is no surer way to melt that resistance and magnetise yourself to that Abundance.

Wishing you an inspired day of awakening and awareness. I am so very grateful that you choose to share this Gratitude Journey with me. Bless ♥ xx

Day 4 – Gratitude Challenge

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 “Feeling grateful or appreciative of someone or something in your life actually attracts more of the things that you appreciate and value into your life.” ~ Christiane Northrup

As we begin Day 4 of our 30 Day Gratitude Challenge, we are already beginning to rewire our brain to look for the positive in life.  We are expanding our awareness to include more of what is good and kind, and we are spending less time looking at the things that do not serve us.

This in turn is making us more magnetic to new relationships and opportunities, and the many small blessings which come our way when we are in flow and living from our hearts.

Let’s begin today with the practices that create the foundation of our Gratitude Challenge.  And tonight, be aware of any feelings or sensations as you hold your Gratitude Rock.

Gratitude rocks anchor energy for us, and act as a touchstone for all that is good in our lives. Image from

Counting Our Blessings and Using our Gratitude Rock

If you need a detailed reminder of the process, you can review it here in Day 1 of the Gratitude Challenge.

  1. List five Blessings in your journal, explaining why you are grateful for each one.
  2. Count your Blessings off on your fingers, summoning positive emotion and saying Thank You from your heart for each one.
  3. Tonight before you go to sleep, hold your Gratitude Rock and affirm I am richly Blessed. I have an Abundance of Good in my life. Visualise one thing you have been grateful for today. Swell that positive energy up in your heart like a beautiful golden light, and give a heart-felt Thank You, Thank You, Thank You to the Universe, then imagine a tiny shower of golden light travelling from your heart into your Gratitude Rock.
  4. Still holding your Gratitude Rock, bless your fellow travellers on this Gratitude Journey by sending them golden light, and saying Thank you.  I Bless You.  I intend for you Love, Miracles and Abundance. Know that as you are saying this for them, they are also saying this for you. Feel that connection and gratitude and know that there is real love and support for you here. Place your rock back beside your bed, and go to sleep, cocooned in this good energy.

It is enough just to do this first part of the Challenge, but if you’re ready for more today we are going to practice gratitude for friendship.

Sharing the Journey

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One of the Blessings of life is having someone to share part of the journey with.

Friendship comes in many forms.

We can find that the companionship and love of an animal can be as rewarding as that of a person.  We might find friendship with a sibling, or a grandparent, a neighbour, a school or work chum, or the local barrista.

We might find connection in cyberspace with someone we will never meet in person, but who comes to be as valued as any friend who we can meet face-to-face.

This beautiful image by the Artist Arunas Zilys

For some of us, our treasured friendships might include Loved Ones who have crossed over, Guides, Angels or God.

Friends love and support us, they share our laughter and tears, they listen to our stories, and they help us to grow.  Some come into our lives for the briefest of times, and some have a longer visit in our lives. And they live on in our memories and our hearts, even when they aren’t here for us to talk with or to hug.

Today, find a way to connect back into that energy of friendship. You can do this by summoning the face of someone from your past, holding them with love in your heart, and saying Thank You as you reflect on happy times.

You might look at a photograph, and send energy to that person, wishing them well, wherever they may be.

You might sit quietly on your own and feel the grace of God, or your Angels and Guides, or your Loved One.

You could hug your pet, phone a friend, or meet for coffee.

When we focus on happy memories, positive relationships and good times, we are attracting more of that into our life.

So today, give thanks for the good friendships you have now, or have enjoyed in the past. Know that as you do this, and celebrate the Blessing of friendship, you are inviting this energy to brighten your heart again.

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Today find time to be grateful for friendship.

I’m grateful for YOU. ♥ Thank you for the gift of friendship. ♥

How to deal with Toxic People

“Toxic relationships not only make us unhappy; they corrupt our attitudes and dispositions in ways that undermine healthier relationships and prevent us from realizing how much better things can be.” — Michael Josephson

What is a toxic relationship? It’s one that diminishes you, that erodes you, that defeats you.

We all experience conflicts, disagreements and difficulties in our interactions with others. That’s a normal part of relationships, and one of the things that helps us to grow, learn patience, acceptance and better communication skills.

Sometimes relationships cause us to feel bad because we have hurt someone, or let them down. Sometimes we just can’t see eye-to-eye on something. That’s normal too.

What’s not normal or healthy are the sort of relationships that are poisonous to you – the ones that inevitably leave you feeling upset, angry, unloved, despairing, stressed or drained. The ones that leave you doubting yourself, giving up on your dreams, feeling stupid and unworthy and changing or limiting yourself because of someone else.That’s a toxic relationship.

How do you recognise a toxic person? A good yardstick is to simply use your own feelings. But here are some personalities you may recognise:

  • Look at ME, Look at ME, Look at ME. These people are self-absorbed.  They thrive on drama and being the centre of attention. They have an ability to turn everything back to being about them. You could be telling them your husband has just been diagnosed with cancer and they’ll say, “Oh my God, how terrible. You know, I knew a woman once who was diagnosed with…” and suddenly your important sharing is lost as this person plays one-upmanship, offering no true compassion or empathy. Sometimes they suck you in with pleas of needing help, but you’ll find that they are never really interested in taking action on their problems.
  • Manipulators.  These people are usually narcissists.  They are skilled at using a combination of flattery or friendliness followed by anger, judgement and put-downs if they don’t get their own way.  They see themselves as better than/superior to you.  They are Masters of emotional blackmail. They disempower you with insidious put-downs (often in front of others), insults, belittling, shaming and embarrassing. They may threaten certain consequences or behaviours if you don’t conform to a certain way of behaving yourself. At the extreme end of the scale they may suffer from Narcissistic Personality Disorder, and you may get trapped thinking it’s your problem, and that there’s something wrong with YOU, when actually it’s them with the issues.
  • Criticisers and Comparers. These people assure you that they love you, and then they try and ‘fix’ you.  You are never good enough, and they always know how you should be doing it. They have a fixed idea of who you should be and how you should behave and it will make you feel devalued and misunderstood. No matter how you try to explain yourself they can’t accept your position or choices in life. They may be know-it-alls or bullies.
  • Perpetual Downers.  These people suck the joy out of life. They are often angry at the world and down on everything. They believe that the world is against them and they have a victim mentality.  They can’t keep their promises, and life never works for them, but it is never their fault because there is always something or someone else to blame.
  • Crazy Makers.  Crazy Makers are unstable. They may be emotionally immature,  suffer from mood swings, behavioural issues, undiagnosed or uncontrolled mental illness, or substance abuse. You can’t rely on them because from day to day you don’t know how they will react or behave.
  • If it suits me.  You’re their second best. If there’s a better option, you’re always dumped. They are in this for what you can give them. There is no respect. They are insincere. You want the relationship more than they do, and they know it, and take advantage of it.
  • Abusers.  Whether it’s physical, emotional or intellectual abuse, abuse is abuse, and no-one deserves that. Get help, or get out. Or both!

In almost every situation, the best thing to do with a toxic person is to remove them from your life, or to remove yourself from theirs. It’s not your job to save them, or fix them. And you sure can’t change them – that’s something they have to want for themselves, and do for themselves.  It’s your job to look after YOU. In the workplace, report bullying, and get support.  Here are some posts that can help you work out if moving on might be an option for you:

Using Your Internal Compass to Navigate Life

Writing Your Way Out of Stuckness

Knowing When to Walk Away

People Will Be Who They Are

Are You Too Nice?

Listen with your Eyes

But what if they are family? What if this is a situation where you can’t just unplug and walk away?

The truth is, sometimes even with family, we need to cut those ties. It might be for a short time, it might be for good. A skilled counsellor will be able to help you get clear about your options. In the end, this is YOUR life, and you deserve every chance at success and happiness.

If you need to stay, here are some strategies to help you cope better:

  1. Stop needing them to be something that they are not. One of the most important reasons that we feel unfulfilled in family relationships is because we needed the other person to be different. Accept them as they are, and come to grips with that. Grieve that loss if you need to, and then look for the guidance, love, acceptance and support you’re seeking elsewhere.  Once we let go of wanting our mother to be wise, or our father to be accepting of us, or our sister to share their emotions with us, or our brother to include us, we let go of being constantly disappointed. You can get to a place of grace with this, so that you can truly understand that this is just who they are, and sit without judgement on that. Acceptance is something we all want. You can love them without liking their behaviour.  Often by getting to this place of unconditional love, the dynamics of the relationship actually start to change.
  2. Limit your exposure.  Find reasons to stay a shorter time, to end the call sooner, to avoid one-on-one time.  Meet in public places if necessary.
  3. Put on your psychic raincoat. Visualise yourself surrounded by a shielding bubble of light before you connect with the other person.  Let it all wash over you – their words and behaviours. There’s no need to change them. There’s no need to engage. Just come from kindness and be polite. Listen a lot and talk little. Direct it all back to them so that they are the one talking. Maintain your privacy and create strong boundaries.
  4. Find a relationship counsellor.  Trained professionals can give us strategies for better handling conversations, confrontations and expectations. Instead of being ‘handled’ and manipulated by others, we can move back into a position of balance and empowerment.
  5. Bless them and release them.  This doesn’t mean walking away.  It means that mentally we bless them with love, and we let go of any and all expectations and responsibilities. They become like a stranger to us. We treat them with respect, and love, but not with intimacy and deeper connection.

Your life is YOURS to live. Life is too short to waste it being someone you’re not, doing things that don’t make you happy, and spending time with people who are posionous to your self-worth. By stepping away from unhealthy relationships we make room in our lives for new, better connections. We renew our hope, restore our freedom and open ourselves to fresh possibilities. Today I’m wishing you strength, real friendships, and true love.  Bless ♥ xx

Soul Messages – The Gifts of Colour

Scroll down through the images and pick the one that speaks to you – the one you find the most vibrant or attractive.  Then go back and select the one you are least drawn to.

When you’ve made your choice, go further down the page and find out what messages your Soul has chosen for you.

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Your Soul Message for today – find the message that corresponds to your flower. Trust that within that message is something useful for you.

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Take a stand for the things that you believe in.  Offer up your opinion and don’t be shy about speaking your truth.  You have so many good ideas and valid points of view, and the world is poorer if you never share them. Self-belief is strengthened through action! Whether it’s speaking, writing, having that conversation, applying for that job or course of study or seizing that opportunity – be bold and begin.

A good crystal for you today is Citrine.

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Trust in your dreams.  The idea you have is worth nurturing. In time it has the possibility to grow in to the thing that you hope for it to be.  Spend a little time each day with your idea. Tend it, work with it, and help it to grow. The Universe is saying Yes to you, and offering validation and encouragement for you to continue – taking your idea from mere thought into the beginnings of reality. Make a plan, put energy into it and you WILL be rewarded.

A good crystal for you today is Fluorite.

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Time to focus on your health. Embrace new forms of exercise that encourage flow and suppleness. Make changes to the way you eat so that you include more food with real life force, such as fresh vegetables and fruits. Drink more water. Reduce the stresses in your life.  Find a support team to help you – whether it’s a personal trainer, yoga teacher, acupuncturist, psychologist, doctor, accountant or meditation teacher. Book in for a check-up, go see the dentist, attend to the things that have been quiet worries in the back of your mind.  It’s time for an overhaul, and by working on the physical body, your emotional and spiritual body will come back into balance too.

A good crystal for you today is Carnelian.

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Embrace your sensitivity. You have a heightened ability to tune into energy and the spiritual realms right now. Make healthy choices with your diet, cut down on sugar and caffeine and the things that clutter your energetic body.  Meditate and spend quiet time in spiritual reflection.  Try journalling and meditation. It’s time to learn how to use your gifts. Be open to messages, guidance and new possibilities.  Trust that the right information, books, courses and people will come your way.

A good crystal for you today is Amethyst.

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Open your heart. Love is right here on your doorstep, or in the taxi and on it’s way to you.  You are deserving of all that is good in life, and you have so much love to share. Trust that now is the time for entering or strengthening and renewing beautiful love relationships.  There’s no need to be stressed or needy around relationships. The Universe wants you to know that you are Loved, and that now is your time. Trust.  Be ready. If you are in a relationship already, look at it with new eyes. If you are currently alone, know that you will not remain so. Have fun with it.  Trust in good outcomes. Let yourself shine. Begin by falling in love with yourself a little. Do all that you can to look and feel your best.

A good stone for you today is Rose Quartz.

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Guides, Angels and Spiritual Messengers are all around you. Loved Ones are reaching out to you.  There is incredible love, support and help for you right now.  You will find your answers, you will get the help you need, you are being supported to stay strong and to keep going. This is such a powerful confirmation for you of one clear message – “Don’t give up!”  Expect signs and messages,  Expect breakthroughs. Know that you are stronger than you think, and deeply Loved.

A good crystal for you today is Clear Quartz.

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Time to schedule some relaxation. Whether it’s a massage, a trip to the movies or something bigger like a holiday, you need some time out! Find time in your life for the things that bring you happiness.  Music is good. Travel is good. Food and friendship are good. Time to yourself, and time doing things that fill you back up again is what is most needed for you right now.  Commit to pampering yourself, to slowing down, and remember to stop and smell the roses.

A good crystal for you today is Tiger Eye.

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You are experiencing Divine Grace.  Divine Grace is the benevolence of the Universe, an energy filled with Wisdom and Love. It heralds great change and great awakening.  You are moving from struggle back into flow. Better times are coming; new opportunities and possibilities. You will not long remain where you are.  Be ready to let go. Be ready to  say yes to what’s coming, and don’t worry if you can’t see too far ahead.  There is all manner of Synchronicity and Right Timing coming into your life. You’ll end up far from here, and be so glad of the journey, and the growth it afforded you. You are Guided and Protected. You are well Loved.

A good crystal for you today is Moonstone.