Gumboot Adventure and a Lyme Update

“One final paragraph of advice: do not burn yourselves out. Be as I am – a reluctant enthusiast….a part-time crusader, a half-hearted fanatic. Save the other half of yourselves and your lives for pleasure and adventure. It is not enough to fight for the land; it is even more important to enjoy it. While you […]

Apprehension

“You should have seen this coming,’ they said. I did see it coming. I saw it coming the way you see a train coming when you’re tied to the tracks.” ~ Margaret Andrews   I’ve been awake since I don’t know when. No, that’s not true. 2.36am. I lay awake in the dark for a […]

Rain, Words and Silence

“A poem begins as a lump in the throat, a sense of wrong, a homesickness, a lovesickness.” ~ Robert Frost   It was raining in the city. Raining and I couldn’t sleep, my head so full of thoughts and my body so tight with pain. Now I’m home, home at my farm, it’s sometime before […]

Requiem For These Passing Moments

“Every one of us is losing something precious to us. Lost opportunities, lost possibilities, feelings we can never get back again. That’s part of what it means to be alive.” ~ Haruki Murakami, Kafka on the Shore “It all goes away. Eventually, everything goes away.” ~ Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love   Sometimes, life is […]

And then the Storm…

“Another secret of the universe: Sometimes pain was like a storm that came out of nowhere. The clearest summer could end in a downpour. Could end in lightning and thunder.” ~ Benjamin Alire Sáenz   Sunday was Drug Number Four Day in my current Lyme medication regime. Today is, too. Ever the optimist, I had […]

Breathing Through The Pain #LymeWarrior

“Your breathing should flow gracefully, like a river, like a watersnake crossing the water, and not like a chain of rugged mountains or the gallop of a horse. To master our breath is to be in control of our bodies and minds. Each time we find ourselves dispersed and find it difficult to gain control of ourselves […]

Soundtrack to Pain

“One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain.”~ Bob Marley Music saved my life earlier this week. Music and drugs. Those of you who follow my blog will know that I am suffering from end-stage Lyme disease. I’ve recently embarked on a protocol of high dose antibiotics, antibacterials, herbs and […]

My Left Eyeball…

“What does not kill me, makes me stronger.” ~ Friedrich Nietzsche I had intended a different post for this morning, but I have an eyeball problem. I’ve been on my Lyme drugs, well the first of them anyway, for a month now, and they are doing strange things to me. All night, apart from the ‘normal’ […]

Crying in car parks

“Let your tears come.  Let them water your soul.”  ~ Eileen Mayhew Over the last twenty-five years I’ve done my share of crying in car parks.  Not just any car parks.  I do have my standards. The car parks I shed tears in have always had a theme.  I’ve cried in hospital car parks, pathology […]

Loving my dinged up life-battered Self – Part 2

“Real isn’t how you are made,’ said the Skin Horse. ‘It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.’ ‘Does it hurt?’ asked the Rabbit.  ‘Sometimes,’ said the Skin Horse, for he was always […]

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