Failure to Connect…

Image from

“I made a nap this afternoon. I made it out of two pillows, a bed, a sheet, a blanket, and exhaustion.”
~ Jarod Kintz

If you’re psychic, or intuitive, or creative, or a writer, or an artist, or a meditator, or a musician – if you have a passion or a skill or a hobby, or if you’re just in pain – then you need to read this!

Have you ever been in love?  You know, that walking-on-air and the-whole-world-is-beautiful kind of feeling…  In that space everything comes together for us, we see the world through rose-coloured glasses, we’re totally inspired and life just magically flows.

Well, today I’m not talking about that sort of energy.  I’m going to talk about being at the other end of the spectrum – that place where our battery is flat, our enthusiasm is zip, and no matter how hard we try we can’t think straight, we can’t feel or function the way we normally do, ideas and abilities desert us, everything is hard and nothing goes our way.

Image from

Sometimes, we end up in a place where we experience failure to connect. As a psychic or intuitive you may be unable to sense things. A meditator may be unable to get into that space.  Creative types may find that NOTHING comes to them, and anything they create is rubbish, or worse.  Others may find that their skills desert them and they can’t execute the simplest task.

We can’t connect, we’re out of synch, stuck in a miserable eddy or backwater instead of in the middle of that glorious energy of flow.

So what do you do when you find yourself in that space? (and if you’re human, it’s inevitable at some stage in your life…)

Firstly, understand that you’re not actually DISCONNECTED, although it may feel that way.  What’s actually happened is that your battery is flat, and you can’t hold enough of a charge to FEEL that connection right now.

Failure to connect can be brought about by stress, illness, shock, depression, fatigue, malnutrition, or excess. (Do I have to explain excess?  Really? Okay – think too much of anything – like too much sugar, caffeine, alcohol, mind altering substances, negative and unsupportive people, work, pressure, exercise… the list is long but I’ll stop here.)

Secondly, don’t panic. This will pass.  Honestly, it will.

Thirdly, you can be proactive, and give your body the conditions that will help it come back to balance quicker.

  • Rest.  Lots of rest.  (But if your issue is an excess of rest, give yourself some tasks and deadlines, and then get to it!)
  • Magnesium.  Find a good supplement and take some!  I favour the powdered forms that have other micronutrients, vitamins and minerals in them too.  Magnesium is such an important mineral, and it runs our entire nervous system, as well as about a thousand other important cellular and support activities within our bodies. We use it up fast when we’re stressed, sick or exhausted. I’ve blogged about magnesium previously, including the joy of epsom salts baths here.
  • If you’re warding off illness, or you’re sick, or in that place of slow recovery, add some Vitamin C and Zinc to support your immune system.  Perhaps you can find a good natural therapist to assist your recovery.  I am a big fan of acupuncture and herbs. But find what’s right for you!
  • Get a massage or a healing of some kind.  Allow your body and mind the time to be quiet and still.  Don’t have expectations of yourself.  Relax, let go and just be for a while.
  • Find some sunshine and sit yourself in it.  It’s a magical pill in the form of full-spectrum light and it has a miraculous effect on our bodies.
  • Let go of fear. Fear holds us in adrenal exhaustion, and ruins our kidney and liver energy. Sometimes therapy helps, sometimes we might need to do something more drastic like end a relationship, leave a job, or change our living arrangements.
  • Fill yourself up. If you’re running on empty, it makes sense. You might need to fill up on cuddles and love, fill up on peace and serenity, fill up on nature, fill up on art and music and movies and ideas, or just plain old fill up on life by heading out the front door and into the world and all its possibilities.  Do something different, go someplace different, fill the well! Ideas on how to do that here.
Blessings at The Sacred Well by Gilbert Williams

It gets so hard to connect when our body is in a space of physical, emotional or spiritual exhaustion. Be kind to yourself when this happens.  Don’t put pressure on yourself to achieve.  If you have known connection before, then you’ll find your way back to that flow again. No need to try.  Just relax into it.  All is well.  Know that you are deeply Loved. ♥ Bless xx

Hi! I'm Nicole Cody. I am a writer, psychic, metaphysical teacher and organic farmer. I love to read, cook, walk on the beach, dance in the rain and grow things. Sometimes, to entertain my cows, I dance in my gumboots. Gumboot dancing is very under-rated.
Posts created 3053

42 thoughts on “Failure to Connect…

  1. As for so many of your other readers, this is bang on cue for me, and I’m in complete agreement about filling yourself up. Over the past few days I’ve had to fill up on rest and solitude, then exercise and nature, and today friendship and love, and all of them had their time and place to get me back on track. I believe that failure to connect is an important learning experience because it leads you to what you need, makes you more resilient, and ultimately replenishes you. It’s not pleasant at the time of course, but what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger! Easier to say now that I’ve come out of the other side of it, I might not have felt quite so optimistic a day or two ago, but it’s very reassuring to know that everyone feels like this sometimes and none of us are alone when we struggle. Thank you for this post Nicole.xo

    1. {{{HUGS}}} It must be something in the air, hey Lorna? I love your wise comments, and am so happy to hear that you have been filling yourself up and taking care of you! Much love to you, dear friend xoxo

    1. I’m going through a long drawn out…. ending? Painful… difficult to let go. Caught between allowing life to flow on without this person, and trying to show him he is loved and supported while he struggles the way he has tried to show me. It’s draining and if I weren’t doing things like art, sleep, and reaching out to people, I’d be much worse off from lack of energy. I need that magnesium 🙂 And I, too, love acupuncture. <3

  2. Ahhh, very timely indeed, Nicole, thank you! I am in the “recharging” process right now, after such an emotionally and physically draining week. I’m learning that it’s okay to do that – and if I ignore the warning signs that I’m ‘depleting’ myself, my body will let me know in no uncertain terms. Wonderful post as always. Sending positive energies, love and hugs your way. ~ Love, Julie xoxox

  3. Nicole… it really is the most amazing thing…Really. I can’t afford to come and see you right now because we just don’t have the funds, even though I desperately want to. Over the last few months though and particularly lately, every time I open my computer and see your blog it is as though the universe has told you EXACTLY what I need to hear to help me out and you have written about it!! Truly! I am just in awe at the moment of how incredible the universe is and the miraculous ways that it works. Even though I have really wanted to come and see you for a reading, I just have not been able to find the money, so….the universe has given me the next best thing! All the information I need right now to get me through until I CAN come and see you! And believe me, when the time is right, I will be there with bells on! But for now, I just want to say… Thank you thank you thank you…like many other people here, I feel like this post was written especially for me…how special is that! And how special does that make you! The work you are doing is so important and means SO much to so many people…please know how appreciated you are. Lots of love to you <3 Xx

    1. Thank you Michelle, for your beautiful post. I have always said that what I want to do with my life is to support people, to encourage their intuitive and natural gifts, and help them know that they are loved, and not alone.
      This is great feedback that I’m on the right track.
      Lots of love right back to you

  4. Good morning Nicole. Well it seems as though I’m even attracting crappy situations aswell. I’m ever so grateful for this post and all the links. I have takin it all in and I think I’m starting the 30 day gratitude again aswell. I’ve always feared acupuncture but my massage lady said last time she was being guided to do some for me so I’m booking in after hearing your faith in it. Ive also just started taking magnesium a natrapath a heart specialist and anything doc said I needed it and now you so I’m going vitamin shopping today. For some reason I fear taking tablets too’ arghh this is pure craziness. I’m going to take some pressure off myself and seek help of a few different types this week. Thankyou for making me see it’s ok to seek help. I love so much the compassion and pure love you have for everyone and Me. I did enjoy this post and the optimism I have back today. I’m up ready to enjoy our beautiful world again. Thankyou <3 Thankyou <3 Thankyou <3 Love Lots Kellie xxx

    1. Kellie – I just read your post and wanted to send you blessings. I’ve been feeling the same way myself, and your post touched me. I hope you are able to find some relief with the accupuncture and magnesium (you have reminded me to take mine too 🙂 ). Look after yourself, and be kind to yourself. Meg.

    2. Oh sweet Kellie… Hang in there, and trust that it WILL turn out okay. The more you can look after and be kind with yourself, the easier everything else will become.
      I know the magnesium will help – powdered ones are great because you drink them as a liquid, or even add them to juice so you don’t know you’re taking it. Endura Max is a gentle to the tummy brand that doesn’t taste too bad either. Sending much love, light and healing your way. Bless ♥ xx

  5. Thank you for this beautiful post! I feel like you’re speaking directly to ME! Love from my son and his father is what seems to keep me going. It makes me feel strong, even on days when I feel weakest. Knowing that they are here with me, loving me no matter the best felling for me right now. Thank you for all your wonderful suggestions btw 🙂 xo

    1. Maria, what a Blessing to know such love in your life. Go gently right now, and practice great compassion towards yourself. You’ll be filled up again and ready to give soon enough…
      Love and Light,
      Nicole xx

  6. Oh my goodness, I feel like this was written for me today. So many times over the last 2 weeks (since my relationship ended) I’ve been afraid of the fact that I am so ‘flat’. I don’t feel my normal spark or joy for life. The relationship breakup came on top of a month of serious illness, so reading this blog post it makes sense to me now. Although it’s a matter of finding what I need to recharge myself. Thank you Nicole!!

    1. Ah, Meg… It’s hard, I know, but now is the time to just accept that how you feel is how you feel for now. And finding out what recharges you is a priceless learning – that level of self awareness is a precious gift that serves us all of our lives.
      Much love to you xx

  7. Oh Nicole – what a wonderful Blog article and so appropriate for me at the moment. Reading your words just has the ability to calm my nerves while inspiring me to take action. I am not sure how many times I can say thank you to you – but here is another one – Thank you.

  8. Thanks, Nicole. You have no idea how much this post means to me. I am so tired and exhausted from the diss. The defense is only four days away and I am still writing. On my birthday no less!

    Thank you for checking in with me too. I am so sorry that I haven’t had the chance to respond. In any case, this post really spoke with me today. I haven’t been taking very good care of myself and expecting better than average results. This was a good reminder to no neglect myself!

    1. Happy Birthday, Daisy! ♥♥♥
      Hang in there, honey, not long to go now and then you’ll be able to rest and play and feast to your heart’s content. No need to reply. You just take care of you!!!
      😀 xx

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Related Posts

Begin typing your search term above and press enter to search. Press ESC to cancel.

Back To Top
%d bloggers like this: