“You think your pain and your heartbreak are unprecedented in the history of the world, but then you read. It was books that taught me that the things that tormented me most were the very things that connected me with all the people who were alive, who had ever been alive.”
~ James Baldwin
I had high hopes for yesterday.
A few early morning pathology tests, and the rest of the day stretching empty and waiting to be filled.
Yesterday was pooping into jars. Bloods. And then meds. A big fistful of meds to kill what might be lurking in my gut.
After which my day went to hell.
And my night too.
A dose of this drug to treat lyme would be a quarter tablet twice a week, and I took a fistful of tablets. Because I’m not treating lyme. I’m treating persistent gut bug that won’t go away. Too bad, lyme. You’re going down too!
My face is numb. My body’s arched in pain. I can’t see out of my good eye and my bad eye is all wonky and double visioned. Old herxing patterns.
So I’ve cried a bit and felt sorry for myself. But the vomiting is done. And there’s no more blood in my poo. And it all seems to be working. And I know the trajectory of this. I feel bad to get better. That’s something I know how to do.
I’m sure by tomorrow I’ll already be 100% more fabulous AND with less lyme.
In fact I can finally go home to the farm today. Hooray!
Sorry, lovelies. I’m a little more unreliable just now than I had expected.
Love you all heaps. A thousand apologies again.
Nicole ❤ xoxo