10 Ways To Be A Friend

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image from http://www.ownedpix.com

“A friend is one of the nicest things you can have, and one of the best things you can be.”  ~ Douglas Pagels


After I posted about receiving all of the lovely letters and packages in my mail a few days ago (most in response to me being unwell), I had a number of people comment on how lucky I am to have such marvellous friends. And then someone asked me HOW I managed to have ‘those sorts of friends’…

I had to think about it for a minute, but I guess the answer is that I invest time in my friendships.  And love. In fact, the question of friendship got me thinking, and led to this list – 10 ways that you can be a friend, because to have a friend you first have to be one:

1.  Spend time together. Laugh. Cry.  Make memories.


2.  Encourage one another, and help your friend to be the best that they can be. Be the cheer squad as they chase their dreams.

Cheering for You Card closeup

3. Be honest, but not unkind. Don’t be afraid to tell the truth, even if it hurts.  If a friend can’t tell you, who can?


4.  Offer a helping hand, especially in times of trouble. Don’t wait to be asked. Do what’s in your heart. Be thoughtful and considerate.


5.  Celebrate life’s good times. 


6.  Be there in the bad times.


7.  Stay in touch. Work through problems and keep showing up.  Good relationships take time, and need effort to be maintained.

2013-02-04 15.06.17

8.  Share.  Share your hopes, your dreams, your secrets and your fears. And keep shared confidences locked away safe in your heart. That builds trust, and trust is essential in a good friendship.

Friends Talking over Coffee

9.  Listen. Listen with your whole heart.  Sometimes all we need is someone to really hear us, and to honour what’s going on for us.


10.  Be loyal.  Stand up for your friend and your friendship.  Support the person even if you can’t support every decision or action they make. Friendships are precious, and they deserve love and care.


Hi! I'm Nicole Cody. I am a writer, psychic, metaphysical teacher and organic farmer. I love to read, cook, walk on the beach, dance in the rain and grow things. Sometimes, to entertain my cows, I dance in my gumboots. Gumboot dancing is very under-rated.
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18 thoughts on “10 Ways To Be A Friend

  1. Wonderful post, Nicole! I also truly believe that if you stick to these ways and be a good friend yourself, you will attract good people who will treat you in kind.

    The proof? We’re friends! 🙂 And I feel incredibly lucky for that 🙂 Big hugs, Nicole!

  2. Thanks for this!!! I’m only starting to really learn how to be a friend! I’ve been very selfish in the past so now I wanna stop that and this list helps immensely! Lovely.

  3. Thanks so much for this posting…yesterday stirred me up as I wondered why some friendships just fall away…and am I a good friend? My parents didn’t have close friends or have people over so I’ve sort of waded through life wondering if this is how you do ‘friends’…it’s the keeping in touch and learning to be honest and how to keep boundaries that I’m still learning..blessings of LOVE to U on this glorious day…just love a sun-shower to start a day…XX

  4. Nicole, you have a beautiful way of seeing to the very heart of the matter and putting it in such a way that no-one could misunderstand your message.
    Thank you do much for another wonderful and heartfelt post.
    Hope your day is wonder filled.
    Love Susan ❤

  5. Yes friendship is giving and sharing and always being there! It’s my most valued job in my life being a friend. Especially to my family!. Love love love xxxx

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