“It has been said, ‘time heals all wounds.’ I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.”
~ Rose Kennedy
“To live in hearts we leave behind is not to die.”
~ Thomas Campbell
Christmas is not always an easy time. There are many of us for whom Christmas brings stark reminders of families broken, loved ones lost, and empty chairs at our tables.
I have found it helpful and healing to make a private little Christmas Altar each year. This way I remember the dead, the absent, the lost. An altar is simply a small dedicated spiritual space that is meaningful to you in some way.
On my altar I place fresh flowers, a candle and some favourite crystals. Things that bring me comfort, and a sense of sacred. Then I place photos or objects that represent a loved one who will not be at my table. That way I can still have them near me, and I can flow love to them and have them be part of my life over the festive season.
The beautiful big owl in the photo above was given to me last Christmas by my friend Angela, who passed away in this year. It will be central to my display.
There is a tiny wooden boat for my brother, and a book for my dad. A sparkly stone for my sister and a gardenia for my mum and all of the women in her family who have shaped and grown and loved me. My family all live far from me. But now they are here on my altar.
My Coral Bird, given to my grandmother Marga, that came back to me this year. Various other little things that have meaning for me or my husband.
Cupcake candles for my darling Kate, who passed away a few years ago, and Julie, who passed away in 2014. My Grandparents, all now passed, are here in photographs too and I will place a glass of sherry, Christmas Cake and some gingernut biscuits out because these are all the things they would have loved to eat, and later I will eat some and think of them. On Christmas Day I will play The Twelve Days of Christmas by the Ray Conniff Singers, and shed a few happy-sad tears.
It’s not the same as having them at my table, but it’s the next best thing.
Perhaps making your own Christmas Altar will help you this Christmas too.
Sending so much love your way, Nicole <3 xx