You do not write your life with words…You write it with actions. What you think is not important. It is only important what you do.Patrick Ness
Dear Little Nicole,
I thought of you yesterday as I was taking part in the Climate Strike march, and how different this world is now from the one into which you were born. I thought of you, and my heart filled with tenderness, and I wanted you to know three things about your young self, and how important they have been, as you have grown to be the person I am today.
1. You were always an activist. I suspect you were born that way. Your first major protest was at the christening of the baby of a family friend. Children were invited to the front of the church to watch as the minister got ready to baptize the babies from the font. The minister spoke about how the babies had been born sinners, and were now going to be saved from original sin. He said that evil would be purged from them. ‘They are not bad. They are just babies!’, you yelled, ‘YOU are a bad man for saying that!’ and then you stormed out of the church in angry tears. You felt so embarrassed and anxious afterwards, and you were worried you’d be in trouble but you had to speak up anyway. I’m proud of you for that.
Since then you’ve protested and taken action about many things, including environmental issues and social justice issues. I wish you’d known back then that it was okay to speak your truth, and that you had worried less about getting into trouble and about what other people thought of you.
2. You knew you were psychic, from the earliest days of your life. You heard things. You saw things. You knew things. And you thought everyone did. How upsetting it was to find out that this wasn’t normal. How difficult it was when no-one believed you, or they did (your maternal grandmother, because she was psychic too) but told you not to ever speak about it. Little Nic, I know it was hard keeping that a secret, but you don’t need to hide it or to be ashamed of it anymore. I wish you had known that you’d go on to help many people because of your abilities, and that you’d help many more to claim their own intuitive and psychic selves as a natural part of their lives. I wish you’d known how important it is to always be yourself, and that the right people will love and accept you for that.
3. You loved books, and you wanted to be a writer and a teacher when you grew up. The library was your favourite outing, and books were some of your best friends. Your dad taught you to read and write long before you began school, and you have been writing stories ever since. I wish you had known that your stories were good, even as a child, and that it was okay to share them with the world. You’ve waited much too long, and worried far too much about not being good enough. I wish you’d known earlier that stories that come to you have come so that you can write them into form and share them. They were never meant just for you. And guess what? You ARE a writer and a teacher now. We often know, right from our earliest years, the kind of life path that will make us happy.
I wonder, all of my wonderful community, what do you wish you had known as a child?
What wisdom and encouragement would you share with a younger version of yourself?
I want you to know that you can tell yourself that wisdom now. There will be days where you still need to hear that.
All my love, Nicole xx
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5 thoughts on “A Letter To My Pre-School Self: Three Things You Need To Know”
I remember telling one of my brothers that I wanted to be a witch one day and then feeling very self conscious about it when he blurted it out to others. I wish I had known to always follow my instincts rather than trying to please them and that my own wishes for my own life are well and truly ok to follow as I see fit.
Thanks for sharing the story of the baptism – it really is indoctrination and brainwashing right from the start isn’t it?!
What a lovely post, I liked it
I also love the baptism story! Fancy telling lies to babies like that- indoctrination starts at the cradle.
Funny that my maternal grandmother was psychic too- but I never actually met her.
I would say to my infant self – have courage. Trust in yourself. Don’t listen to the negativity of others.
OMG that is just the sweetest post. I just loved the baptism story. I had a similar story at sunday school, where I was told Joan of Arc was a witch & evil, to which I replied, she is not evil, Jesus parts a sea, then feeds thousands of people with just a loaf of bread and a couple of fish. Now that’s some sort of scary magic or something. I left in disgust dressed in my sunday best fav dress, little gloves and hat…home to my tomboy clothes and probably climbed up my fav tree or laid on the earth watching the field hawks. The solution was my parents enrolled us in Christian Correspondence Classes which I would happily sit my younger siblings behind a table out under the trees and tell my own version of the stories. I did craft with them too. I loved to teach, I wanted to be a teacher, I am about to become a Teacher. YaY! This post is just what I needed to read this morning…thank you Sweetheart…XXXXX