Waking Up Happy In The Middle Of The Night

“My happiness was a bright star exploding in my chest.

I can still feel it, long after that bright spark ignited inside me.

~ Nicole Cody

Hey, Lovelies.

The oddest thing happened to me on Monday night.
I have not been sleeping well. Pain, discomfort, worry, and the brutal force of insomnia have taken a toll these past months. Then my Lyme treatment started, and things deteriorated further.

It is not understating it to say that I have been struggling and in despair at facing two years of this brutal treatment.
After only getting 2 hours sleep on Sunday night I had retreated to our bedroom at 5.30pm on Monday to meditate, and by just after 7pm I was in bed, groggy and finally able to drift off to sleep.
I woke at 11.04pm.
It felt as if I had been asleep for days.
The night sky was hung with fluffy white clouds that were lit from behind by the almost-full moon.

There were a few twinkly stars.

The big old pine trees were silhouetted black against the night sky’s backdrop.

It was incredibly beautiful.

As I sat in bed and watched the world though my window I was swept by a deep sense of calm, and an incredible joy.

I realised that, due to the next few weeks of heavy treatment, I had no events planned, no clients, just a few medical appointments and an open schedule.

I had time to rest.

I had time to write.

Time to be embraced by solitude and old trees and night skies and morning light.

Happiness exploded in my chest like a bright star.

I sensed a presence around me.

It felt profound.

I have not experienced such a joy in a very long time.

Days later I still feel that joy and happiness as a point of light inside my chest, and a deep need to sit at my desk and write.

That’s exactly what I’m doing.

It’s like the stars delivered some kind of magical elixir.

I don’t know what it means, but I’m open to whatever comes.

Sending love, and holding you in my meditations, Nicole xx