Is there anything more reassuring than being taken seriously by someone you hope can help you?
Choosing Differently for 2024
I had a defining moment in a bathtub a few months ago. It changed everything…
Not Quite Myself Yet
Isn’t it funny how you can be totally fine, and also not, all at the same time…
Reconnecting With An Old Friend
I ran into some old friends the other night. I’m so glad that I did!
Living In A Body – The Things No-One Talks About
We all have bodies. We all have souls. And all of us hurt sometimes.
I didn’t push myself yesterday
Pushing yourself? Maybe it’s time to do things differently.
Counting Down The Hours
Today I’ll find out if I can stop my current drugs, or if I have to continue them. Mentally I’m prepared for my last two tablets. After that. I can’t rightly say…
Lunch As Medicine
Sometimes, you just need dumplings and tea…
Off To The Doctor Again
There are only two sorts of doctors: those who practice with their brains, and those who practice with their tongues. —William Osler Hey, Lovelies. I’m off to the city with Ben to see my favourite physician, get some test results, and the next steps in my journey. I’m also in the thick of doing testing, […]
Sometimes you just need a moment
If you feel lost, disappointed, hesitant, or weak, return to yourself, to who you are, here and now and when you get there, you will discover yourself, like a lotus flower in full bloom, even in a muddy pond, beautiful and strong. — Masaru Emoto Hey, Lovelies. I needed a moment yesterday. I felt […]
That Unsettled Feeling
An unsettled person will constantly rant about inconsequential things. ― Charmaine J Forde Hey, Lovelies. I have a full day of medical appointments today. Test results, action plans, and who knows what else awaits? I’d love to say that I’m calm, but I’m unsettled, and I will be until the day is done and I […]
Milestones
My path has not been determined. I shall have more experiences and pass many more milestones. ~ Agnetha Faltskog Hey, Lovelies. It’s been a pretty crappy 14 months healthwise, between late stage Lyme, a misbehaving heart, an intractable UTI superbug and a myxedema crisis – but I am delighted to say that I am […]
Not Fighting It
Fighting anything takes energy, so I’ve decided that’s not a great use of what little I have…
The Slow Climb Back
I think that little by little I’ll be able to solve my problems and survive. ~ Frida Kahlo Hey, Lovelies. I have missed you. Also, I have missed myself. These past two weeks have been hard. (Don’t know what happened? Go here.) It has taken time to get my new medication right, and we’re […]
Well, That Was Unexpected…
She looked as if she were about to burst into tears, but she was wonderful at catching the ball of her own mood in mid-air. ~ Rebecca West Hey, Lovelies. Well, this has certainly been the year. As you know, I live with a complex bucketful of dodgy genes, autoimmune diseases, chronic infections, post-viral […]
What The Doctors Said, What The Nurses Said
It would not be possible to praise nurses too highly. ~ Stephen Ambrose Hey, Lovelies. I’m staying home today. I’m not planning on going ANYWHERE. And if you’re squeamish or have issues with bodily emissions stop reading now, or go straight to the bottom of the page… As most of you know I am […]
Answering your questions about my wellbeing
Am I okay? Thanks for asking. Here’s my answer…
Are You Ever Slow To Take A Hint? I Might Be…
“Signs. Senses. Synchronicities. Connect the dots. Follow the breadcrumbs to your destiny.” ~Anthon St. Maarten Hey, Lovelies. I was having a Facebook Live chat with my Inner Circle members yesterday, discussing the energies of the month, and how it’s a great time to pull a card for yourself to help you see the bigger […]
Why I wear my hair like this right now…
The old woman was a witch shadow – hair like matted spiderwebs, hooded ’round darkness of features, eyes like glittering jewels. Frank Herbert Hey, Lovelies. So, I want to talk about hair. Ah, I’m sharing another of my great secrets now. You can tell a lot about my state of wellness by how I wear […]
Losses and Gains
Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose. Yoda Hey, Lovelies. I went back to my regular yoga practice yesterday. I have a routine I do every morning, using an app to which I subscribe. Lots of floor based work to help my lower back, lots of stretching and flow poses. It’s […]
When My Husband Asked Me If I Really Needed To Bring My Handbag…
She reaches down into her bulging tote bag and pulls out a small plastic box with a hinged lid. It contains a round pill box with a threaded lid from which she tips out a vitamin pill, a fish-oil pill, and the enzyme tablet that lets her stomach digest milk. Inside the hinged plastic box […]
I took a deep breath and changed things
Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced. James Baldwin Hey, Lovelies. I did something quite radical yesterday. Radical, but so in keeping with the energies of August, and this Lion’s Gate Portal. I set up a meeting with my team. I sat in front of […]
My Own Pfizer Post-Vax Journey – Part 1
Laughter is the only medicine without side effects. Shannon L. Alder Hey, Lovelies. I promised I’d keep you posted on how I travelled after my first Pfizer vaccination. I live with chronic illness, heart problems, thyroid issues, autoimmune stuff and late-stage lyme disease. Plus a bunch of genetic things. So, I was a little concerned […]
What I Did Yesterday
You’re never perfectly safe. No human being on Earth ever is or ever was. To live is to risk your life, your heart, everything. Rick Yancey Hey, Lovelies. So, yesterday I did something important for myself. I got my first dose of the Pfizer COVID vaccine. I made the choice to get vaccinated in consultation […]
Brrrrr – that feels AMAZING!
If we always choose comfort we never learn the deepest CAPABILITIES of our mind or body. Wim Hof Hey, Lovelies. Yesterday we did something quite mad. And it was so good we’re gonna do it again today. Ben and I jumped into our freezing cold pool (it’s winter here but even in Summer our pool […]
You Can Be Strong AND Scared and that’s okay!
Bran thought about it. ‘Can a man still be brave if he’s afraid?’ ‘That is the only time a man can be brave,’ his father told him. George R.R. Martin – A Game Of Thrones Hey, Lovelies. I’ve been busy this past few weeks, supporting some of our community through some really tough stuff and […]
Don’t ever give up on change
The secret of change is to focus all of your energy not on fighting the old, but on building the new Socrates Hey, Lovelies! I’m back in the city after my whirlwind trip away. I am delighted to inform you that I drove safely to my destination, had a relaxing time with family, and then […]
I bought myself a birthday gift
What you are is God’s gift to you, what you become is your gift to God. Hans Urs von Balthasar Hey, Lovelies! I’ve had a wonderful four-day weekend, taking some time to reconnect with family, and to disconnect from social media and work for a few days. We celebrated my birthday with a simple home-cooked […]
It’s almost here!
“You never change your life until you step out of your comfort zone; change begins at the end of your comfort zone.” ~ Roy T. Bennett Hello, Lovelies! I’ve been wanting a new website, an upgraded membership program, and a place to run my online courses from for a very long time. Problem was, my health […]
Gumboot Adventure and a Lyme Update
“One final paragraph of advice: do not burn yourselves out. Be as I am – a reluctant enthusiast….a part-time crusader, a half-hearted fanatic. Save the other half of yourselves and your lives for pleasure and adventure. It is not enough to fight for the land; it is even more important to enjoy it. While you […]
You can still matter, make art, make a difference – even if you’re sick, broken or dying.
“She made broken look beautifuland strong look invincible.She walked with the Universeon her shoulders and made itlook like a pair of wings.” ~ Ariana Dancu Lovelies, I have something important to tell you and I need you to hear it and take the truth of it right down inside you so that it can illuminate those […]
The Sweet Smell of Night
“Pleasure is wild and sweet. She likes purple flowers. She loves the sun and the wind and the night sky. She carries a silver bowl full of liquid moonlight. She has a cat named Midnight with stars on his paws. Many people mistrust Pleasure, and even more misunderstand her. For a long time I could […]
A Nicole Update and A Little Lesson In Surrender
“After all, the true seeing is within.” ~ George Eliot, Middlemarch Did you know that the energies of November are great for all forms of metaphysical work, for clarifying our Life Path and for honouring a life-calling by owning our capacity to share knowledge? It’s also a month for honouring our connection to the natural world, and to […]
Wishing for Good Veins
“I have druggie veins. After so much intubation they are scarred and flat and tired and difficult to handle. It’s an odd thing to confess but the truth is all I notice is people’s hands and their veins these days. I have as much vein envy as any junkie. Oh, I think. Look how fat and juicy that […]
A Week Of Wonders
“Well, I always know what I want. And when you know what you want–you go toward it. Sometimes you go very fast, and sometimes only an inch a year. Perhaps you feel happier when you go fast. I don’t know. I’ve forgotten the difference long ago, because it really doesn’t matter, so long as you […]
An ordinary night of magic!
“The purpose of life, after all, is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.” ~ Eleanor Roosevelt We’re in the city right now, and last night something quite wonderful happened. Our neighbour joined Ben and I and we walked a few blocks down […]
Join our Book Reading Challenge for June 2018
“If you only read the books that everyone else is reading, you can only think what everyone else is thinking.” ~ Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood Do you love to read? In January of 2017 a group of us embarked on the inaugural Cauldrons and Cupcakes Reading Challenge. It was a fine year of reading, friendship and sharing […]
Keeping It Real For You
“A good selfie is when you successfully capture the feeling of that very moment!” ~ Anamika Mishra Yesterday I ventured out into the world for the first time in weeks. This flu has really laid me low, and I’m still far from well but yesterday Ben, Cafe Dog and I went out to check the […]
That 2am Place – A Lesson In Mindfulness for Insomniacs
“It was that sort of sleep in which you wake every hour and think to yourself that you have not been sleeping at all; you can remember dreams that are like reflections, daytime thinking slightly warped.” ~ Kim Stanley Robinson I’m still in the grip of this flu. Not only that, I’m stuck in the city […]
My Latest Obscenities…
“Whenever you speak the truth, someone will be offended.” ~ Laurence Overmire Yesterday I posted about having the flu (no fun!) and with that post I included pictures of myself showing me as I am right now – sick with the flu! Thanks to everyone who sent me messages of love, care and support. I’m so […]
Me, Flu and You!
“There are in nature neither rewards nor punishments — there are consequences.” ~ Robert G. Ingersoll You might have noticed I’ve dropped off the face of the Earth these past few weeks. There’s a reason for that. I’ve just come face-to-face with a very nasty strain of influenza. For most people flu is a mild […]
Three In a Row!
“The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep.” ~ W.C. Fields This morning I’m celebrating a minor miracle at my house. For the past three nights I have gone to bed, fallen asleep and then woken in the morning. It’s been years (at least fifteen!) since I’ve had an uninterrupted night’s sleep, […]
Sorry You Missed Me Yesterday…
“Persistence and resilience only come from having been given the chance to work through difficult problems.” ~ Gever Tulley I was intending to blog yesterday, and then I couldn’t. Early on Monday morning I was strapped into a heart monitor and holder for twenty-four hours, and while I was wired I had to stay […]
I’m Taking A Short Road Trip
“Go outside. Don’t tell anyone and don’t bring your phone. Start walking and keep walking until you no longer know the road like the palm of your hand, because we walk the same roads day in and day out, to the bus and back home and we cease to see. We walk in our sleep […]
It’s crowded here right now…
“Nurses dispense comfort, compassion, and caring without even a prescription.” ~ Val Saintsbury While I’m busy on bed rest just now I’m being very well looked after. Harry and Rufous take turns to stay with me during the day. Except for nap time, when we all bunk in together. There’s no chance of me […]
Ginger, Ginger, Ginger!
“It doesn’t matter how many times you get knocked down. All that matters is you get up one more time than you were knocked down.” ~ Roy T. Bennett Instead of blogging this morning I have been processing raw ginger root. One kilogram of organic ginger from our local farmers markets. Peeled. Then chopped. Then […]
Fancy Gumboots – Perfect For Dancing!
“Dance, when you’re broken open. Dance, if you’ve torn the bandage off. Dance in the middle of the fighting. Dance in your blood. Dance when you’re perfectly free.” ~ Jalaluddin Rumi “You’ve gotta dance like there’s nobody watching, Love like you’ll never be hurt, Sing like there’s nobody listening, And live like it’s heaven on […]
When Husbands Are Right…
“Wherever you find a great man, you will find a great mother or a great wife standing behind him — or so they used to say. It would be interesting to know how many great women have had great fathers and husbands behind them.” ~ Dorothy L. Sayers Big day for me yesterday! Two […]
Love Looks Like This
“Do not ask your children to strive for extraordinary lives. Such striving may seem admirable, but it is the way of foolishness. Help them instead to find the wonder and the marvel of an ordinary life. Show them the joy of tasting tomatoes, apples and pears. Show them how to cry when pets and people […]
Nic’s Latest Update: Life as a #Lymewarrior
“O snail Climb Mount Fuji But slowly, slowly!” ~ Kobayashi Issa “Bran thought about it. ‘Can a man still be brave if he’s afraid?’ ‘That is the only time a man can be brave,’ his father told him.” ~ George R.R. Martin, A Game of Thrones Ah, Lovelies, I’d hoped to be bringing you […]
Not Exactly Happy!
“She looked as if she were about to burst into tears, but she was wonderful at catching the ball of her own mood in mid-air.” ~ Rebecca West Thanks for all of your positive thoughts and wishes. Yesterday kinda sucked. But I’d known it would, so no surprises there. I could have been up all […]
Apprehension
“You should have seen this coming,’ they said. I did see it coming. I saw it coming the way you see a train coming when you’re tied to the tracks.” ~ Margaret Andrews I’ve been awake since I don’t know when. No, that’s not true. 2.36am. I lay awake in the dark for a […]
Rain, Words and Silence
“A poem begins as a lump in the throat, a sense of wrong, a homesickness, a lovesickness.” ~ Robert Frost It was raining in the city. Raining and I couldn’t sleep, my head so full of thoughts and my body so tight with pain. Now I’m home, home at my farm, it’s sometime before […]
This Dawning Day
“Veil after veil of thin dusky gauze is lifted, and by degrees the forms and colours of things are restored to them, and we watch the dawn remaking the world in its antique pattern.” ~ Oscar Wilde I woke earlier than usual today. 3am. The night air was cold, the comforter pulled right up […]
An Update from Nicole
“Life can be like a roller coaster with its ups and downs. What matters is whether you are keeping your eyes open or closed during the ride and who is next to you.” ~ Ana Ortega Hi, Lovely Friends. You may have noticed I’ve been absent for a few days. I’ll be honest in […]
An Amazingly Ordinary Fabulous Day!
“Do not ask your children to strive for extraordinary lives. Such striving may seem admirable, but it is the way of foolishness. Help them instead to find the wonder and the marvel of an ordinary life. Show them the joy of tasting tomatoes, apples and pears. Show them how to cry when pets and people […]
Changing Your Perspective Changes Everything
“Most misunderstandings in the world could be avoided if people would simply take the time to ask, “What else could this mean?” ~ Shannon L. Alder I met with a new doctor yesterday. It was a trial of sorts. I wanted to see if they would become my Lyme Recovery Plan A, or whether […]
Doctor, Doctor…
“As my sufferings mounted I soon realized that there were two ways in which I could respond to my situation — either to react with bitterness or seek to transform the suffering into a creative force. I decided to follow the latter course.” ~ Martin Luther King Jr. When do you accept your current circumstances, […]
For When It’s Hard To Be Grateful…
“But that was life: Nobody got a guided tour to their own theme park. You had to hop on the rides as they presented themselves, never knowing whether you would like the one you were in line for…or if the bastard was going to make you throw up your corn dog and your cotton candy […]
Packing My Suitcase…
“Wandering is the activity of the child, the passion of the genius; it is the discovery of the self, the discovery of the outside world, and the learning of how the self is both “at one with” and “separate from” the outside world. These discoveries are as fundamental to the soul as “learning to survive” […]
Choosing Your Emotional State
“Bad things do happen; how I respond to them defines my character and the quality of my life. I can choose to sit in perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of my loss, or I can choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most precious gift I have – life itself.” ~ Walter […]
A Little Lyme Recovery Update
“Every day you may make progress. Every step may be fruitful. Yet there will stretch out before you an ever-lengthening, ever-ascending, ever-improving path. You know you will never get to the end of the journey. But this, so far from discouraging, only adds to the joy and glory of the climb.” ~ Winston S. Churchill […]
My Unscheduled Five-Star Holiday!
“Whenever I pull an oracle card for myself, it always seems to have one message… Rest!” ~ Nicole Cody Hello Lovelies, I’m having a little enforced rest in this lovely five-star resort (some would call it a hospital!) due to my naughty misbehaving heart. Thank you, Lyme Disease. Even on the way out of […]
Colouring Crew Clubhouse!
“Maybe we should develop a Crayola bomb as our next secret weapon. A happiness weapon. A beauty bomb. And every time a crisis developed, we would launch one. It would explode high in the air — explode softly — and send thousands, millions, of little parachutes into the air. Floating down to earth — boxes […]
Boots ‘n’ All
“It is only with true love and compassion that we can begin to mend what is broken in the world. It is these two blessed things that can begin to heal all broken hearts.” ― Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free That, my friends, is photographic evidence of true love. Me in […]
Poking Bruises
“When we are tired, we are attacked by ideas we conquered long ago.” ~ Friedrich Nietzsche I’m still editing this memoir. Because of that, I did something really dumb. I couldn’t remember a detail about someone’s appearance. An old friend from the past. Turtle. What colour were his eyes? I couldn’t tell in any of […]
‘Second Chance’ Spagyrics Sale
“Because this is what I believe – that second chances are stronger than secrets. You can let secrets go. But a second chance? You don’t let that pass you by.” ~ Daisy Whitney, When You Were Here A few weeks ago I posted about some powerful natural medicine that has helped me in my […]
Two Steps Back
Don’t ever give up. Don’t ever give in. Don’t ever stop trying. Don’t ever sell out. And if you find yourself succumbing to one of the above for a brief moment, pick yourself up, brush yourself off, whisper a prayer, and start where you left off. But never, ever, ever give up. ~ Richelle E. […]
The Joy Of Ordinary
“And while it takes courage to achieve greatness, it takes more courage to find fulfillment in being ordinary. For the joys that last have little relationship to achievement, to standing one step higher on the victory platform. What is the adventure in being ordinary? It is daring to love just for the pleasure of giving […]
The Slow Climb Back
“Every day you may make progress. Every step may be fruitful. Yet there will stretch out before you an ever-lengthening, ever-ascending, ever-improving path. You know you will never get to the end of the journey. But this, so far from discouraging, only adds to the joy and glory of the climb.” ~ Winston S. Churchill […]
Dancing Out Of the Lymelight
“Stubbornly persist, and you will find that the limits of your stubbornness go well beyond the stubbornness of your limits.” ~ Robert Brault I’m off to see my Lyme Doctor today, and I’m hoping for a good report. In the last few months I’ve noticed real and sustained change. I have more energy. People […]
It Had To Happen…
“The sin which is unpardonable is knowingly and wilfully to reject truth, to fear knowledge lest that knowledge pander not to thy prejudices.” ― Aleister Crowley, Magick: Liber ABA: Book 4 Just read back over this before I posted and thought I might insert this small disclaimer: Oops, cranky alert… Also, minor potty mouth. I’m […]
On Overcoming Obstacles
“Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not: nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not: the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.” ~ Calvin Coolidge I have always wanted to […]
My Day’s Best Medicine
“Always laugh when you can, it is cheap medicine.” ~ George Gordon Byron There is one thing Lyme has taught me that is well worth sharing. Some of the best medicine isn’t prescribed by a doctor. Here’s some of my favourite medicine. The smell of pine trees and sunshine. Posies of sweet little flowers from […]
Lit up like a Lyme Green Christmas Tree
“You’ve gotta dance like there’s nobody watching, Love like you’ll never be hurt, Sing like there’s nobody listening, And live like it’s heaven on earth.” ~ William W. Purkey Well, you know by now that when I’m quiet there’s a good reason. This time? My doctor recommended a new combination of Lyme drugs. Result? […]
My Early Christmas Present
“I wandered everywhere, through cities and countries wide. And everywhere I went, the world was on my side.” ~ Roman Payne, Rooftop Soliloquy Monday was my day off. A day to rest, sandwiched between two days of psychic work on either side. I am in Brisbane right now, and the plan was that Ben […]
I should be grumpy this morning…
“The art of being happy lies in the power of extracting happiness from common things.” ~ Henry Ward Beecher I should be grumpy this morning. Really, really grumpy. I have now completed my third drug-free week from my lyme treatment, letting my liver have a break. At first I was so grateful to not have to […]
Today’s Post Is Short For A Very Good Reason
“We have to allow ourselves to be loved by the people who really love us, the people who really matter. Too much of the time, we are blinded by our own pursuits of people to love us, people that don’t even matter, while all that time we waste and the people who do love us […]
That Lovely Land Of Rest and Dreams
“Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night.” ~ Edgar Allan Poe, Eleonora Daydreaming. That’s what I’m doing today. Daydreaming has a special magic. It allows you to try on different ideas and realities. It helps you to explore the future in a way […]
Breathing Through The Pain #LymeWarrior
“Your breathing should flow gracefully, like a river, like a watersnake crossing the water, and not like a chain of rugged mountains or the gallop of a horse. To master our breath is to be in control of our bodies and minds. Each time we find ourselves dispersed and find it difficult to gain control of ourselves […]
Lovely, Lovely 3am
“You were born and with you endless possibilities, very few ever to be realized. It’s okay. Life was never about what you could do, but what you would do. ” ~ Richelle E. Goodrich, Smile Anyway: Quotes, Verse, & Grumblings for Every Day of the Year Every day, since I was around twelve years old, I […]
Attack of the Gorn
“Of all the things we can feel with our minds and bodies, severe pain is the purest, for it drives everything else from our awareness and focuses us as perfectly as we can ever be focused.” ~ Dean Koontz There is this thing that happens to me on my current Lyme drugs. It started in […]
A Big Green #Lyme Anniversary!
“We are not the same persons this year as last; nor are those we love. It is a happy chance if we, changing, continue to love a changed person.” ~ W. Somerset Maugham I was talking with my sister yesterday, and she said to me, “Hey, are you planning anything special for your thirty year anniversary […]
Requiem For A Lost Poet – #Lyme
“I don’t need a cloak to become invisible.” ~J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone I found out earlier this week that a fellow Lyme sufferer in the USA took her own life. I never met Heather, but I know her journey. All late-stage Lymies know, and understand, because so easily, that could […]