Letting Myself Cry…

“The cure for anything is salt water. Sweat, tears, or the ocean.”
~ Isak Dinesen

 

It’s been building up for a while.

I do my best to manage it. I meditate twice daily. I ground myself. I sit in awareness and go gently when I need to.

But it’s never enough…

 

All the things I feel.

All the things I know.

All the things I see.

All the things I feel you hiding.

All the pain I feel inside you.

All the things of yours that I feel in me as I connect with you, hug you, work with you. Recent things, old things, things from childhood. Things sometimes from before even that.

All the injustices and terrible things that I see in the world or in some of my work where I must live with that knowledge, and the fact that I can’t change it.

All the times I can’t keep someone safe.

All the times my dreams become a continuation of the truth and suffering of others so that I might take some of that burden from you, or so that I can share that information with those who are empowered to act.

All the weight of all the things and all the feels and all that raw life.

 

Sometimes I find myself moving more and more slowly. Getting heavier and heavier in my body and my spirit. It comes upon me and I know that I can only hold it back for so long.

It always ends in tears.

But, after I have cried I feel better. Then I will take a walk, and then a swim in the ocean or a long shower.

Things go back to manageable again. The weight is lifted from me.

I have learned that it is okay to cry. In fact, sometimes it’s the only thing that truly helps.

How about you? What do you do to manage the weight of the world?

I am refreshed this morning, and sending so much love to you as I sit in meditation,

Nicole <3 xoxo

 

 

20 thoughts on “Letting Myself Cry…

  1. I sleep or cry, I try to write everyday, somedays I can find focus and I meditate….. lately I haven’t known what do to do. I just sit a stare at my screen and try and find answers in google. Sometimes I do, most times I’m too overwhelmed and I let the day roll away and sleep. Thank you ❤️

  2. I have tried meditation and mindful breathing but it just seems to bring more nightmares so I take the valium instead. I have tried to get help, spent hours pouring my heart out to a social worker but only wasting my time, she has nothing to offer, trying to transfer to a psychologist but none want to take hubby and me on as “case too difficult.” I have resorted to cutting myself as it is easier to focus on the physical pain instead of the emotional. Like above, google did find me some help, I have just started to learn EFT, maybe that will help. Thank you.

  3. It was tears of exhausted frustration yesterday. Last two weeks of sleep have brought dreams of the greatest hits of my lifetime regrets or moments I would rather forget, all my insecurities standing raw in front of me. Yesterday the tears fell, I Journalled with a plea of ENOUGH! Last night it was a calm, deep, restful sleep. Finally the sun within me is shining again. X

  4. I am sorry that this burden falls upon you, I have heard this of people who see what others do not and give of themselves greatly. You may know Anthony William the “Medical Medium” – he regularly goes temporarily blind as a result of using his gift. Thank you for your service – may you find that release and peace you need.

  5. Nicole….that post is beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing. Rita

    On 9 March 2017 at 15:06, Cauldrons and Cupcakes wrote:

    > Cauldrons and Cupcakes posted: ” “The cure for anything is salt water. > Sweat, tears, or the ocean.” ~ Isak Dinesen It’s been building up for a > while. I do my best to manage it. I meditate twice daily. I ground myself. > I sit in awareness and go gently when I need to. B” >

  6. Hi Nicole. Do you ever wonder if your psychic abilities are a double-edged sword? I need to exercise daily to release stress. Regards, Rita

  7. Tonight before sleeping I shall send you Reiki, for healing, for comfort and for strength…
    I shall send each and every night. Please, look after yourself. With love..

  8. If I were carrying the weight of the world as you do, add in an illness of such a profound nature and I’m surprised you don’t cry more often. The things you see would be enough by itself. I know I wouldn’t have the strength you have to continue the work you do. I’m happy to took a little time to restore. Hugs from Marlene

  9. I just noticed ever since this year began…,I feel heavy trying to get through each day & emotions breaks out as tears during meditation…also I need periodic nap time to to regain my strength….I feel what you are saying Nicole…. surrendering to higher self is the answer 🙂

  10. I don’t know how you do it, Nicole and I am in awe that you are able to give so much even when you probably need support yourself. I am so sorry for my laziness in reading posts xxx

  11. I always say I feel like you live my life Nicole . I have the same feelings believe me . I guess we are strong because we are still here hoping for the best and enjoying the simple beautiful things all around us what else can we do ?
    love and admiration,
    Jo-Ann

  12. Nicole .. your words..your voice.. “you” in the world . Allows. Simply allows – energy to flow, people who are searching to heal, your voice is all at once a trumpet heralding or a clear delicate purposeful chime so true that it immediately makes irrelevant the loud sounding din that can cloud the senses. Thank you for being you..for trusting you.. for loving you..and for sharing you with all of us. Peace and blessings

  13. We all love you Nicole, for so many reasons, mainly because you pour so much of yourself into healing others.
    You see and sense things we cannot, but I hope you can see more love and lightness coming through to see the balance is shifting for the better.
    I’m one of those who cannot see but I have sensed in recent times, people ‘in the street’ are more courteous, generous and kinder in their words. This keeps me going when I read about the very ugly stuff that is more obvious and harder to cover up by the perpetrators. It’s tiring shifting a planet’s balance, no doubt about it. But we ARE the change we wish to see in the world. 🙂

  14. Dear precious Nicole, ever since my husband passed away nine months ago I cry to release the physical, mental and emotional pain of grief. It does help relieve the pain but what I have found that helps the most is I ask God and even my beloved husband to reach into my heart chakra (right where it hurts the most) and hold me. I ask them to relieve my pain and anxiety. In less than a minute I feel a deep relaxing warmth fill my heart. The tightness and pain relax and I am calm and soothed. As a result of this I know, without a doubt, all is well and is as it is intended. I too used to let myself become distraught over all the horrible injustices in this world but I am a little Buddhist in my belief that this world is an illusion, created by God to work our way back home to Him. Buddha said, “No one saves us but ourselves, no one can and no one may.” We who are just a little awake, must do what we can in our own small corner of the world, but to take on the suffering of others’, when it is their karma to work out, will only deplete us and we won’t be able to help others and ourselves as effectively.
    Offered from my heart with love,
    Lisa

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