The Apology Fallout – Some Good News

“The best relationships in our lives are the best not because they have been the happiest ones, they are that way because they have stayed strong through the most tormentful of storms.” 
~ Pandora Poikilos

If you read my blog last week you’ll know that I received an apology from someone I’d known at College – ‘James’ (not his real name), a man whose behaviour with me had been less than stellar. You can catch up on that story here.

Yesterday I had a message in my inbox from James’ oldest daughter. We then caught up by phone.

She wanted to let me know that her Dad found my blog, and had read the post about him. He’d then left it open on his laptop while he’d gone out of the room for a moment. Meanwhile, his wife brought him a cup of coffee, saw the computer screen, read my blog and put two-and-two together. Her husband was the man who had assaulted me at College and then propositioned me a few days ago, even though both he and I are married.

The daughter found them arguing loudly, and as her parents fought her mother made her daughter read my blog too. The daughter told me she was appalled at what she’d read, but she was also angry at herself for never having said anything because her dad had done this kind of thing for years. So she yelled at both of them; her mum for putting up with her father’s poor behaviour and her dad for treating his wife so disrespectfully. She told her mum that unless her dad changed she should leave him. Then she stormed out and left them yelling at each other.

The result, now that things have calmed down? Her mum and dad are going to marriage counselling because James recognised that his attitude and behaviour were not who he wants to be or be remembered as, and he is not being the kind of man he would want his own daughters to marry. He loves his wife and he loves his daughters. He wants his marriage to work. He’s committed to change.

His daughter loves him very much and assures me that he has been a good dad and that her parents love each other although her dad’s behaviour has not always reflected that. She really hopes he changes. I do too. I’m holding space for a good outcome for them all.

Some of the most beautiful relationships I know have come through the hardest of times. I hope they find a way forward and rekindle that love, respect and connection. I wish them well.

Nicole xx

11 thoughts on “The Apology Fallout – Some Good News

  1. Of course!! These are the times where truth will rise to the surface. I love your way of tesching through your experiences.

  2. That is amazing to hear I hope it all goes well for them ❤️. I’ve been there too and I know how it feels. I feel that anger and range when I see him too, and sometimes I’m still shaken, but slow and steady wins the race. Sending you lots of love Nichole ❤️❤️. This is the beginning to healing. Mysty.

  3. The ripple effect in action.
    It is almost miraculous the way in which a small action on our part can cause massive changes for others.
    I hope it all works out in the end.

  4. He is a different person now. It’s been a huge shift for him. He is now closer to the person his wife hoped he was all along. Keep up the soul work James and you’ll be a great catalyst among your bros who also thought such behaviour was a bit of fun. But humiliation is never fun and karma is tough.
    All the best for everyone waking up to the energies xxx

  5. That’s wonderful. He finally had his overdue comeuppance. Let’s hope he now realises how appalling he has been and reform himself. For the sake of the family I hope they stay together. 💚🦋🐜🐨🐝

  6. Wow, talk about ripple effect! It will be a very hard time, but the pattern has been broken. Hope the ripple effect will continue🌈

  7. This all happened because you were brave enough and loving enough to confront “James” and get closure for yourself. Your loving spirit is helping heal lives everywhere. Thank you for what you do, and for who you are.

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