“Love is the voice under all silences, the hope which has no opposite in fear; the strength so strong mere force is feebleness: the truth more first than sun, more last than star…” ~ E.E. Cummings
I have not seen the Orchard Man for months, but I was not surprised when he walked out of the rain and gloom the night before last.
There had been a thunderstorm after midnight, which woke me right towards its end. Apparently I had slept solidly through the storm’s worst. As the rest of our little family snuggled down to go back to sleep I crept out onto the back veranda, where I sat in my rocking chair, looking out over the gardens and the citrus orchard which span the hill behind our farmhouse.
I had sat there in the dark perhaps ten minutes when the Orchard Man came. He was dressed in long heavy pants and a thick checked shirt. In one hand he carried a lantern. He stopped just by the magnolia tree, less than ten feet away from me, seemingly unaffected by the downpour.
“Good Evening,” he said unexpectedly. His voice was warm and his accent vaguely Irish.
I was so surprised that I stopped rocking. The Orchard Man had never interacted with me before.
“My name is John,” he continued. “And this time here, I see you are Nicole.”
“Yes,” I said. “Yes, I am.” I was so bound up with excitement and curiosity I could barely get the words out.
“You’ve scant rememberings,” John smiled. “‘Tis how it should be. But you’re of the line. You know you carry the gifts.”
I nodded. A barn owl swooped down and landed nearby.
We both looked over to it. He cleared his throat.
“We’re known to each other, you see. Alice, who came to visit you and your sister; me, who came to follow Alice. We’re all soul kin. You’d be wanting to call us a Soul Group. We are each connected and we come through the line, together, or connected between this space and yours over and over through time and space.”
I felt it. I felt his words deep within me. I knew them to be true. And I felt something else, so sharp, so painful that my eyes pricked with tears. “I have no children, ” I said. “The line stops with me.”
“Aye. In the tree of this family the line stops with you. And it is as was planned, although you no longer remember. But that is not how a soul group works. We are threaded through the bloodlines of this wider family, and we will continue to reappear through the line as oft suits us. Younger souls, older souls – all helping each other, all growing and learning and becoming. Over and over again. Having no children in this life does not conclude the line, only this small branch of the tree.”
I couldn’t stop the tears that ran down my cheeks. I’d always thought that one day I would be a mother, and though I am resigned to it, part of me still aches that it will never be.
“You and I, we are gardeners tending the family line. We prune a branch here and there so that the tree may grow strong and true. There isn’t only this. We are eternal. You are eternal. We all endure. We all go on. And love, love binds us all. There’s no harm done in this line stopping here. It shall go on somewhere else in this vast old tree. We are always connected, and you are never, ever alone.”
I sniffled, and tried a smile. “Are you waiting for Alice?”
“Yes,” he smiled too, “but I was also waiting for you. It’s nearly your time, you see.”
I knew he didn’t mean dying. I can feel it too. This idea that something big is about to happen. I can feel it swelling within me, but I can’t put voice or shape to that thing yet.
I looked up and he was gone.
Another owl flew over and perched above me.
I will wait. And I will be patient. Because it’s coming, and that’s why I signed up for this life…
All is well.
We are never alone. And we are much loved. I know that with my whole heart.
Hey Nicole, I love reading the stories of your soul connections, I feel the shivers in my body with each connection you describe out there in the world of energy. Thank you. Michael x
I am sitting crying into my coffee …I wish you weren’t miles and miles away I would give you a hug sweetheart …so here is one coming out of your computer from me and Oscar .
Cherry x
Fabulous!! Just love it. Thankyou for sharing xx
Thank you dear Nicole! I too am so happy for you. Look forward to more. Love Lyn x
Ahhh soul sister…I always knew we were related in some way or another..not in a bejay and begorrow cliched way..but rather in a deep ancient matriarchal warm healing way…as your dream time with dem ladies brought you over the clouds to our cold but loving and funny personed place…and also that you always say..you are very loved to those who follow your blog…Well always always this is the message I channel..you are so loved (to everyone I meet esp the less fortunate) and Nicole consider how many you parent on a daily basis…pity for some that we have to learn how to be through books and blogs having had shaky parenting ourselves…but that being said bless our shakey parents (as we shakily parent) and heal their wounds and huge blessings and love to those who fill in the parenting gaps as you do by teaching about self belief, self esteem and taking back our power..and your stories.well they just blow me away because I too know we are surrounded by animal spirits and ancestors angels and guides who love us and guide protect and urge us on daily..much love and stuff….xxx
Thank you so much for sharing this. I, too, have received messages this weekend about coming home, and I also know it has nothing to do with dying. Also had some information revealed to me about myself that I’m still processing. And I too, know that I signed up for this journey. But reading your post reassures me that there are others on this earthly plane that are sharing this journey with me and that makes all the difference to me. Namaste and be well.
So much love to you Nicole xxx
Wow Nicole! And well-said Mitch, I couldn’t agree more xo
Gosh Nicole what a blessing to have John speak to you. This post brought out a well of emotions for me. I’m at crossroads of my child bearing years and still feeling lost as to what my future holds. I thank you for gentle reminder that all is well and we are loved very much xxx
Appreciation to you for sharing this very moving story with us Nicole. Loving hugs for the days when you feel sadness that the branch will not expand beyond you. Thanks to John for showing you the bigger picture. Not only are you the gardener for your family line, but you are the little gardener to the many souls who follow your daily blog – planting and tending, sharing and instructing, inviting and delighting, gifting us with posies of your inspiration, inner knowledge and creativity. Blessings. xox
WILD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <3
Nicole, so so happy for you.
Just awesome! I think none of us are alone, but you’re the one expecting something big. I bet you’re very excited!
I was hanging off every word !!! Now patience is a virtue….. Thanks for sharing this with us. It’s a privilege. xxxxxx
what a lovely thing to read first thing this morning 🙂
Wow! More goose-bumps. You really have SUCH a special gift Nicole. Hugs X
Wow! that’s all I can say….
It is Spring…and change is part of this
seasons…time to nest and nurture!
OMG…goosies…and lovin’ each word as it resonates deeply…and I feel that something big is also approaching for me…just need to ‘tidy up’ some loose ends & be patient…but your BIG is super awesome for sure…much LOVE & big HUGS…XO
Thank you. I also have felt this branch ending and that something big is approaching.
dear nicole, i am excited for the big changes coming for you. thank you for sharing your deepest thoughts, joys and sorrows with us. knowing about your life adds so much richness to mine. love, pamela
John, the orchard man. I’m so glad to read you finally got to speak with him. Change is a coming sister.
Arohanui