“When you say yes to others, make sure you are not saying no to yourself.”
~ Paulo Coelho
This is a quick but important reminder.
It’s okay to say no.
It’s also okay to only say no. By which I mean that you don’t need to add a justification, an excuse, a reason or anything else.
As the quote at the top of yesterday’s post stated: ‘No’ is a complete sentence.
I know, you’re used to being a Pleaser. You’re used to considering the needs and feelings of others. And that’s great. But not when it means that you are running yourself dry, that your limited time and energy can’t cover your own needs, or when everything inside you is screaming for you to stop, or shuddering with resentment at the things to which you have said ‘yes’.
I’m sure you know people who do what they please. They go home when they want. They decline party invitations or change their mind at the last minute, they happily tell you if they don’t want to do something, don’t like something, or just would prefer to be doing anything else. Or maybe they just say ‘no’, smile and walk away.
Truth is, the world will keep turning, the sun will still rise, and life will continue – even if you do something as earth-shatteringly radical as saying no in order to put your own needs first.
The energies of March encourage you to strengthen your ‘no’ muscle. It might take a little practice, and it may make you uncomfortable at first, but I promise you’ll get the hang of it, and eventually you’ll be glad you did!
Take some time this week and feel into your body as you contemplate whether you want to say yes or no to something. Your body will tell you the truth, even if your mind disagrees. Look for the feeling of relief that comes as you say yes to what matters, and no to what doesn’t. It’s life-changing, and we all need a bit of that right now.
I’m cheering you on.
Love and encouragement, Nicole xx