If I can’t write, if I don’t have words, then I don’t know who I am anymore.Nicole Cody
It was a rough day, yesterday. And like on so may other rough days, I cried in the shower, and as I cried words came. When I got out of the shower I hurried to write them down. As I wrote them down a great peace came over me and then I was returned to myself, and I could move on with my day.
That’s the way it always is.
Writing and meditation are my great coping skills for life. That, and cups of tea.
I don’t write these words for anyone else. They are just for me. A purge of emotion, or a way of making sense of myself or the world, or both. It’s something I have done since I was a kid, and my private journals are filled with my scribbles, and stuffed with envelopes and shopping dockets when it was the only paper I could find and the words just needed to come.
But I’m sharing this one with you, because it’s a journey many of you might relate to, and I hope that perhaps one of you may feel encouraged from these words.
Hugs and love from a tear-stained and peaceful Nicole xx
I am Steel
When I was an angry young woman
I wanted to change the world
with my fire.
I pitied the soft-bodied elders
Whose eyes leaked tears
And whose lips spoke comfort.
Where was their rage?
Now, I am older.
My body is soft and sometimes unreliable.
My eyes frequently leak tears –
Of compassion for the journey,
Or love and wonder for the miracle
Of our existence, our fragility, our connectedness.
My lips speak comfort
For the road is hard
For us all.
I still hold that angry young woman’s fire
within me, and her flame
and the crucible of pain and suffering
that is life
has tempered me.
Now I am steel.
Strong enough to carry the load
of caring for community
of caring for myself
Soft enough to live open-hearted and open-armed
to the World.
I am steel, forged by life
wrapped in soft-bodied, eye-leaking, comfort-speaking elderhood.
I give thanks for this great journey.
PS: Want to join me for some healing and meditation?
Lovelies, as you know, I am in Sedona right now. Over the next few days I will be sitting in shamanic meditation out in nature in a number of places in Sedona, using techniques taught to me by my Aboriginal Aunties and from my own channellings, to energize and reactivate songlines, gridlines, portals and vortexes within and around the earth, and also within the human body. If you’d like to participate in these sessions, and be open to some healing energies please come on over and join my free Facebook group. All the details to join are below. Then look for a post titled Working in The Vortex and add your name in the comments. I’ll see you there xx
Link for my free group is: