When You Know Something’s Wrong

 

Intuition is a combination of historical (empirical) data, deep and heightened observation, and an ability to cut through the thickness of surface reality. Intuition is like a slow motion machine that captures data instantaneously and hits you like a ton of bricks. Intuition is a knowing, a sensing that is beyond the conscious understanding — a gut feeling. Intuition is not pseudo-science.

~ Abella Arthur

Hey, Lovelies.

Today I want to remind you of the power of your intuition.

Our senses are constantly taking in information. Occasionally we get a bit that doesn’t fit. A word, a gesture, an inappropriate comment or behaviour. Small things. So small they barely make a ripple in our conscious mind. We blink and it’s gone, but a flag goes up somewhere in our subconscious.

Over time, if there are more pieces of similar information, things that don’t sit well or are out of place with the normal flow of life, our subconscious keeps storing it all away. Then one day, when it’s most needed, the puzzle pieces fit together, and our intuition presents us with a big fat uncomfortable feeling or thought that we can’t ignore.

Sometimes it’s about realizing your partner has a secret, or a drinking problem. Sometimes it’s about acknowledging that there’s something serious going on with your health, or your child’s. Perhaps you see a side to someone you don’t like. Maybe the new employee’s stories don’t add up.  Perhaps a friend or family member’s behaviour has started to become out of character. Or your dog is drinking far more water than normal. Even as other people, including experts or professionals, reassure you that everything is fine.

We possess powerful skills of observation. We are wired to take in information from multiple sources, without being consciously aware of that stream of data. We have an internal emotional and energetic guidance system; a sixth sense. That guidance system is there for a reason – it alerts us to problems and danger.

I’m not talking about ongoing neuroses, paranoia, or drama. I’m talking about that sudden clarity we get, that information which comes to us and we can’t ignore.

I talked to my client Anna* (I’ve changed her name to protect her privacy) yesterday, after she fled a coersive control and domestic violence situation with her young children. I’d had a bad feeling about her now-husband from when she was first introduced to him – I could see he was controlling and narcissistic, and used to getting his own way – and I didn’t know she had gone on to marry him.  I asked Anna if she had ever had alarm bells ring about him before they got married. She did, just two days after they met. They had eaten lunch at a fancy hotel and afterwards the concierge brought the man’s expensive sports car up to the front of the hotel for them. When the concierge stopped the car, he realised he was too far away and then stalled the car, trying to restart it. The man whom Anna later married raced over to the car, wrenched the door open and pulled out the young concierge by the shirt, abusing him and yelling angrily into his face before pushing him off, getting into the car and indicating for Anna to do the same. They drove off, and the man who would later be Anna’s husband immediately became calm and acted as if nothing had happened. Anna told me she was still shaking from the shock of it when he dropped her off at her parents’ home. He was utterly charming to her parents, and they told Anna they thought he was a complete gentleman. She couldn’t bring herself to tell them what had happened early that day.

Many times after that she would witness his extreme rage against people whom he felt had slighted or disrespected him or his property but she put it down to his high pressure job, and the fact that he may have been disrespected in the past due to his racial heritage. He was handsome, rich, successful, and he treated her like a Queen until after they married… The day of their marriage, when he brought her back to their hotel suite after the feast and celebration for four hundred people, she questioned something he had organised for them for the next day. He slapped her and told her Do not disobey me. I own you now!  Anna said she knew then that she should leave him, but she couldn’t bear the shame that would bring to her family, and so she decided to always make him right and put him first. But as we know, that didn’t work… The time to have walked away from him was ten years before, when she had first been frightened by his behaviour.

Sometimes we just know when something’s wrong.

If ever you have that kind of knowing, I urge you to pay attention and take action.

Love, hugs and my wishes that you listen to that inner guidance of yours, Nicole xx