Finding moments for yourself

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“You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.” ~ Buddha

 

Life can be hectic. Sometimes we just have too much on our plates; life can thrust responsibilities and duties upon us that eat up our day, deadlines get suddenly crazy, or sometimes we’re the one driving ourselves.

I want to remind you that even on the busiest of days, that especially on the busiest of days, it’s important to find moments for yourself.

Even the smallest moments can be restorative.

But Nicole, I hear you say, you don’t understand! I’m just too busy…

My friend, if you’re too busy for even a few snatched moments you’re in real trouble! And the fact is, this frantic pace you’ve set yourself is an illusion – it pumps you full of stress and adrenalin, it fills you full of resentment, it pulls you out of the flow of life, and it leaves you broken in body and spirit.

If you want to be able to cope, even on the busiest of days, you need to find small moments just for you.

Here are some restorative moments to include in your life:

  • Take a moment to feel the sun on your skin.  Close your eyes and drink up the warmth and energy. Pull the sun’s blessings and power right into your body.
  • Take a short time out and really enjoy a refreshing cold drink, or a nurturing warm one.  No thoughts of work, no to-do lists.  Just a few quite minutes of genuine respite.
  • Go for a short walk.  Walking gets us back in rhythm.  It soothes the jagged edges, gets rid of some of the adrenalin, and clears our minds.
  • A quick phone call or skype call to a friend or loved one. When I got stressed back in my corporate life I used to call one of my grandmothers, just to hear their caring voice, just to remind myself that I had a life outside all of the madness. Now I ring my sister.  She’s always encouraging.  She makes me laugh.  She reminds me I can do this. *Note – it can be an equally restorative act to phone and support a friend.
  • Eat lunch away from your desk.  Go to a park, or the little cafe around the corner. Sneak into a booth somewhere and hide from the world for a while.
  • Soak up the view. In the bus on the way to work, from your office window, from the kitchen sink, in the park outside the hospital – look for the beauty, feel the wind in your hair, hear the twitter of birds, see the dance of sunlight on water, or the kick of leaves with the gentle breeze.  Anchor yourself in the now. Be aware of your surroundings and drink them in.
  • Lose yourself in a book for a while.  Books take us places that help us escape from the grind, drudgery and pressure of our everyday lives.
  • Put your headphones on and give yourself the gift of a favourite song.  Listen to every beat, every lyric, and every message.  Let the music get right inside you.
  • Find a few minutes each day to work on a craft, hobby or project.  Carve out a little space in your life just for you and your interests. A little time often works better than a lot. A friend of mine is finally finishing a quilt she started for her son when he was born.  He’s married now and expecting his first child! My friend started out allowing an hour, and found that in that hour she’d make tea, thumb through a magazine, let her mind wander.  Now she gives herself ten minutes a day, right after breakfast. Ten minutes and all she does is quilt one small piece, by hand. In a short time she’s made huge progress because she’s applied energy consistently. And she deeply looks forward to her quilting time each morning, even thinking about how she will best use that time, in odd moments throughout her day.

You need to treat yourself well, especially when life stretches you. Don’t wait for a reason to be kind to yourself, don’t promise yourself a break as a reward for getting the job done.  I know you, you’ll have your next mission booked in and the break will be forgotten, or you’ll cut corners on yourself to give your time to others, or other priorities.

Start with small moments. And build from there. Those small moments are life-saving, sanity-making, and best of all, they’ll help restore something magical in your soul.

“I have an everyday religion that works for me. Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. ” ~ Lucille Ball

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18 thoughts on “Finding moments for yourself

  1. Baby steps for me, but I’m definitely getting there 🙂
    If I feel overwhelmed I remind myself it’s ok to take 5, breathe, look around at all the beauty before me & don’t feel guilty. Your words a few weeks ago have helped me realise I need to value myself more than I was, and now that I am things seem so different, for the better 🙂 thank you x

    • Feeling guilty – that’s the killer, isn’t it! I’m so pleased to hear that you are being kinder to yourself, and making space for yourself in your life. You’re worth it, and life is so much better when we slow down and breathe it all in. Much love to you, Ros xx

  2. Every morning rain or shine… a cup of tea outside with the stillness in fall/winter and the birds singing in spring/summer at 5am….this is my “me” time 😀 !!

  3. I love your daily posts nicole. I love waking up making my coffee and looking in my inbox to see what treats you have for us….. you have made a huge impact on my life and I thank you for helping to guide me home. Arohanui sweet angel xx

  4. You are so correct..I spent my whole life hurrying ..busy..must do this and that …everything for everybody but me..I got resentful of the people who had the “time” to live life. Now at 64 I have stopped and am having a hard time finding the energy or motivation for anything . I feel great just being..like you said enjoying a morning coffee in the sun..playing with my dogs…chatting with friends..I finally have time for me and my husband…a little late in life to realize the importance of ME..I just thank the gods for every beautiful day that I can enjoy what I want to enjoy without guilt. Don’t wait do it now..love you Nicole

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  6. Nicole noticed the less cool than usual breeze this evening and the rain drops on my face whilst hauling in copious amounts of food for the always hungary head stuck in the fridge teens…..it is so beautiful to take a moment and feel it….I often dont touch ground till weekends…what a blessing it is to be alive and well and how foolish it is to race and run…busy going exactly nowhere and then realising that I have been in but missed a great part of my own life…am taking more of those moments whilst doing the meditation from last week the right way around..as my delightful banshee dtr would say yay me! much love Nicole and pink stuff…xxxx

    • I love the imagery of your happy face upturned to the rain as you haul in the food to feed your hungry family. All these small moments of joy and beauty – that’s what makes it so good to be alive. Blessings and pink stuff right back to you xoxo

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