So Many Questions

“An infinite question is often destroyed by finite answers. To define everything is to annihilate much that gives us laughter and joy.” 
~ Madeleine L’Engle

I’ve been inundated with two main types of questions since my post yesterday about being woken by a voice with a message for me. These are YOUR questions, filling up my email, my facebook messages, my phone.

1. Who was the voice I heard? Was it God, Saint Peregrine, an Angel, a Guide, a dead rellie, my imagination or subconscious?

2. What did they mean?

I have to be honest here, and my answer may surprise you. It is simply this; I don’t know. And more importantly I haven’t felt the need to ask those questions myself.

All I know is that since I heard the voice I have experienced a deep and abiding calm. I am reassured and comforted. My anxiety about my health and situation has eased. Since hearing that voice I have this luminous spark inside me. It’s a tangible, visceral thing. I truly have felt a shift.

Image from prattcentre.net

Image from prattcentre.net

I have not questioned what happened because my experience is so complete that words and questions seem both unnecessary and inadequate.

That seems odd considering my personality – I usually hate not knowing something. I am the one who asks a million questions and won’t drop whatever it is until I have answers that satisfy me. (Try that combination with being a psychic – it’s enough to do your own head in!) When I don’t get answers the questions generally keep rattling around in my brain, sometimes for years. Not this time.

So, who spoke to me?

I don’t know and the need to know is just not here inside me. I am empty and full at the same time.

What did they mean when they said I would turn the corner?

It doesn’t matter. I am filled with peace and safety and acceptance. Whatever happens is okay.

Another friend sent me this:

“Nic, aren’t you worried what people will think? I mean, hearing voices sweetie is one thing, given what you do. But announcing it so publicly? People don’t judge this stuff very well. Maybe you’re sharing a mite too much and being just a little too open and vulnerable right now. Maybe hold off on this stuff until you’re well and can use better discernment.”

Sorry. I’m done with pretending. And I’m done with hiding things. My life is what it is, and I’ll keep sharing it honestly. Did I mention already that it’s all okay?

The one thing your questions have done is remind me about a time in my life when I was shown by my wise Aboriginal Elder, Auntie, about the importance of questions and answers.

Songlines Aboriginal Art - Papunya

Songlines Aboriginal Art – Papunya

So tomorrow I’ll share another installment of my Kimberley Story.

Much, much love to you, and Thank You, for all of your comments and questions, for all of your love and support. It means the world to me. (((HUGS))) ♥ Nicole xx

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24 thoughts on “So Many Questions

  1. Who/what doesn’t matter. What does matter is the sense of peace you gained at a critical time. I’ve learned so much from you. You’ve helped me in ways you will never know. Here is hoping that you continue to hear the voice and you continue to draw peace and wisdom from what you hear

  2. Don’t hold back on any story or experience that you have to share. Your experiences are what the world wants to hear about…….all of them…..no matter what! I applaud you for sharing with us! You are one of the most sane people on the planet! love for you, pamela

  3. Agree and so pleased that you have been given a message that gives comfort during your very difficult time. As a psychic am sure you walk between the world and the “more than” all the time so it all sounds utterly and absolutely sensible and sane given your gifts. The world of spirit is all around and permeates the everyday (I believe) and Nicole dem ladies…I just can’t wait. X

  4. You go girl…..love your response, your being real…feels like you have shifted and floated into a secure place of not knowing and knowing at the same time. Sooooo grateful, sending huge love.
    Victoria

  5. Nicole, thank you so much for hearing your voice and for sharing. I love the truths you reveal to us, they give me strength to continue my journey and have helped me to also arrive at a turning point. Love and blessings to you xxx

  6. Yay, the time for hiding is over for all of us. I’m not going to apologise for my spiritual, magical thinking and beliefs anymore either. Thank you for sharing this with us Nicole. I figure I’m more uncomfortable hiding it than anyone will be who is hearing it. Woo hoo. Who know being weird and freaky could become even more fun.

    You rock!

  7. You are so authentic and I love that. You are so connected to your body, mind and soul. It takes a very special person to become that connected.

    I don’t know if you remember but I commented on your blog a few weeks ago as we couldn’t find a Doctor here in Perth, AUS to test me for Lyme. I had been diagnosed with everything but. You had told me to contact Lyme Disease Australia and I was able to find a Specialist who I saw this morning.

    This morning I was diagnosed with a clinical diagnosis of Lyme with 2 co infections (Borrelia and Bibezia). I am going to have the full testing done also but she said that as I have suffered for 10 years, it may not show up positive in the specific test results so she is going to treat anyway. I am getting married in July so I decided to wait to do the antibiotic treatment when I am back from my honeymoon. Prior to that I am having detox treatment.

    I just thought I would let you know that as a result of me praying for answers, I stumbled across your blog. As a result of stumbling across your blog, you helped me to contact someone. As a result of me contacting someone I now have a diagnosis. I thank you for that. I have spent thousands on treatments and appointments and testing already but I can now see the light because I have an answer.

    I know it’s not going to be easy but at least we all have each other for support.

    You were the answer to my prayers.
    x

  8. Your timing again Nicole is amazing. Myself and a few friends held our first spirit cirlce last night. This article covers much of our discussions and we all come to the same conclusion…… to be ourselves and not hide who we are. Thank you

  9. I was eating my breakfast toast and enjoying your morning post as I do!!! (When you are up to it at the moment.)
    I laughed at the bit about the dead rellie – it is like trying to figure out who sent you a Valentines card. I get the fact that sometimes it is just nice, glorious, and warm to know that someone loves you and is caring for you. Thank God for blessed dreams, guidance and voices – we all get them – it is just a matter of whether we are able to listen.
    May it be that bit of hope you need to cling to in a very tough and isolating time. For what it is worth I have heard a voice like this a few times in my life, just on waking – just a one liner like yours about something I am dealing with – and they have come true. So in spite of what is being pelted at you – believe!!!

    lots of love and resting under the doonah with a little pocket full of hope.

  10. Hi Nicole. My name is Lynley and a found your blog only recently, and I believe that it’s something I needed to read at a time I needed it, so I thank you for sharing your journey with us.
    I meant to reply yesterday but was busy, but still I want to share with you that I too have heard that voice. The same as you described it- loud, authoritative and loving.

    A few years ago I was in the depths of a depression I never thought I’d get out of. I woke crying and fell asleep crying, and contemplated ending everything. And I prayed. One night I had a dream that jolted me awake to write it down, like I HAD TO. I’d never had a dream like it. It was brief, monochrome. A wet winters day at the beach- just one image- a woman on her hands and knees in the shallows, sobbing in the water as rain fell quietly. Then the voice- a booming voice over. It said “I always thought our shadows walked together in the sunshine- but they don’t. They’re on the sand, on the beach, in the rain.”
    I had no idea what it meant but I knew I had to write it down. It was a little while before I understood the meaning- that on the sunny days one can see the shadow of the person walking by your side, but on the grey days when there are no shadows it doesn’t mean that you are alone just because you cannot see a shadow.
    Anyway, that night was the night the shadows began to lift and I began to find myself again, and I have no doubt that your pain too will soon pass.

  11. I love “I’m done with pretending”, there is so much of ourselves we hide from the world simple because it’s not socially acceptable. Funny how we get to the very edge of life, a place where we don’t even know if we can cope and we get such a clear message to continue. Thank you for sharing so much of yourself we us Nicole you are so appreciated. Hear voices well sure I do too, see things that are meant to be there, well tick that one off. Funny that these things appear in the DSM IV along with magical thinking, religious delusions, sensory hallucinations etc there is aways that assumption well if I tell people the kind of information I get they will think I’m crazy not connected, intuitive or a medium. Sometimes these things feel like a curse, but more and more I’m realizing what an amazing gift they are. Perhaps I’ve gotten a little off topic here, I mean to say I hear you, thank you for being you and sharing openly. Much love and healing light to you. Very excited for the next Kimberley story xx S

  12. I loved that blog and what you shared. I too have heard that voice, and in fact, it saved my life once when it woke me in the middle of the night when an intruder was about to enter my unit.
    There is such a deep abiding peace in connecting with the wisdom of this voice. And I love that you are done with pretending. You are such an inspiration. May your spark continue to warm and encourage and nurture you.
    Xx
    Simone

  13. I agree, Nicole, we do not need to put a label or name to what has happened. The feeling of comfort and calm you received was what truly mattered. Recently I was in distress, just starting to experiment with meditating, and I called on my angels for help. I was feeling directionless and alone and in transition to an unknown future. Then with my eyes closed, an image of a man in glasses and wearing an old captain’s cap suddenly appeared and sat down close in front of me. He looked at me with the kindest, love-filled eyes, then faded away almost before the experience registered and I opened my eyes in wonder. Surprising as it was, it also reassured me that someone was there looking over me, who cared deeply about me, and I felt great peace and renewed hope.

    I told a religious friend about what happened and she said with no hesitation, “oh, that was Jesus”, which is the label important to HER and comfortable in HER world as an obvious explanation. This was not MY explanation, it did not resonate with me, and my friend almost brushed off what happened to me with an easy label. For ME, whoever it was is not that important to know, only that it was someone so very special, who maybe appeared in a form that I could understand so I could accept what he was giving me. I have felt for a long time that I have someone watching over me and this experience reassured me that this is so. The experience was mine alone, so very personal and positive. He needed no name or religious reference to skew the experience I had. The feeling he conveyed, what I received, was all that I needed.
    Just like the feeling of comfort and hope that you received from the voice you heard, Nicole.
    Love and Hugs
    Alice

  14. No, you’re not “sharing a mite too much”. You’re teaching us all to be fearless. Thank you for being the blessing that you are. Julia X

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